A DEAD CANON

ANNOUNCEMENT

2009-11-01T09:17:00.003-06:00

This blog is dead.

1. It does not reflect my personality and interest anymore.
2. I don't want to use a former school blog to write my daily quarks and quips.
3. The name is not that cool.

It will die indefinitely...

UNTIL THE SEAGULLS CRY...

Einstein, God and Fallacy

2009-09-28T20:29:00.001-06:00

I just watched a very interesting video today. In an elementary school class, the teacher (or rather, a professor) gives a very inappropriate logic puzzle to the obviously puzzled young students, the problem of Evil. 'God creates everything. Evil exists. Thus, God creates evil. Therefore, God is evil.' However, the professor does not have his way so easily as a precocious boy stands up and debunks his argument. 'Professor, does cold exist?' The professor automatically nods. Then, the student gives out his entire reasoning. Basically, he 'proves' that cold is merely an absence of heat, and the same applies to the problem of Evil. The boy also provides another example about darkness as merely being the absence of light. Associating darkness and cold as Evil, he concludes Evil is just the absence of Good. Therefore, God is not evil. Let's leave the stumped professor behind and focus more on this boy, who's later 'revealed' to be the young Albert Einstein. First of all, I will use the 'turn the chessboard over' method I have learned from a certain anime. We can also say that heat is a degree of coldness. Thus, the main problem is that we have to assumed first which one 'truly' exists, cold or heat. Can you see the circular argument here? Physics says that the very fundamental concept of heat is based on the (assumed) existence of photon. 'Cold' and 'hot' are just reference terms in our everyday language about the amount of thermal energy, thus related to the amount of photon. The same applies with light and darkness. Then, how can we draw the line between coldness and hotness? It is because of our previous experiences. We have the memory of what 'normal' temperature is like, thus defining the borderline of 'hot' and 'cold'. Ask people who live in other regions. They may not agree with your defined borderline of 'hot' and 'cold'. Applying this to the problem of Evil, how can we draw the borderline between 'good' and 'evil'? Needless to say that it is rather a false analogy, even if we force the analogy to work out, we will be baffled with the problem of drawing the borderlines. Therefore, I can turn your argument around by saying that moral principles are relative and so on. Now, can you see the misuse of language here? You can say that death is absence of life, evil is absence of good, folly is absence of intelligence, etc. I beg to differ. You have to be careful when you put all those concepts into the context of degree, especially using physics phenomena as analogies. Saying that evil is a form of non-existence of good implies that you say 'nothing' is 'something'. Secondly, what do you define as 'evil'? Is it the action? Is it the intent? Is it the outcome? I'm not going to wander through ethics this time since it would digress from this discussion. In addition, from all the books about the Person of the 20th Century (according to the Time magazine) I have ever read, I don't know of such tale. It would be so ridiculous to know that Einstein is that careless in his reasoning, even though his grey matter might not have developed fully. We have to be more critical of his theories then. My last message: beware of anonymous, unqualified Internet memes. Any comments, guys?

Consumerism to the max

2009-08-09T10:03:00.002-06:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QibF2JWl7Zc

It is a perfect epitome for cultural globalization.

Pepsi -> America

K-ON -> Japan

Combo -> Clever Advertising Strategy Throughout the World, Especially Among the Anime Fans

....

I like this...

Seagulls and Miracle: Flying High in the Sky of Ontology

2009-07-31T06:36:00.011-06:00

A tale about witchcraft. A series of gruesome murders in a deserted island in the middle of the vast ocean. Hidden piles of gold in the forest. A dying stinking rich, mysterious, old man. A group of inheritors try to acquire the most by putting sweet faces across and brutal acts behind. A naive youngster is in for all the answers.

Umineko no Naku Koro Ni, or When The Seagulls Cry, is a combination of those standard subplots and elements of everyday storytelling, but the main plot is the most intriguing of all. What will you do if you find yourself ostracized because of your astute but not substantiated agnostic belief in a phenomenon that most people widely accept as supernatural? The mass killing of all your friends and loved one is one horrible thing, but the worst anguish when you discover you don't have the superhero prowess to crush the living daylight out of the monster.

As many good stories do, Umineko has several layers of interpretation. As a start, let me define my ultimate interpretation of this story: a battle of with between superstition and science. The main protagonist, Battler, is someone with tough, unshaken beliefs that witchcraft does not exist, even after he experiences the presence of his arch-nemesis, the Golden Witch Beatrice (a tribute to Dante?), and even gets revived and aided in his quest to unravel the mystery of murders using human reasoning alone. On the other hand, the supreme witch Beatrice epitomizes the kind of deity who is so bored with her omniscient power that she plays a cruel, unfair game against the humans.

Enough summary. Let's go back to the period when witchcraft did 'exist'. The Medieval Europeans tended to succumb to superstitions in tough times when disasters and plagues, like Black Death, struck. Witches, or at least people who were accused of practicing the black magic, were staked to death in the fire, while another flame of passion called the Enlightenment started to creep inside the brightest minds in the continent. This highly skeptic and critical mindset, although initially only existed in the form of Copernican revolution, ended up transforming political and economic system. Newton was not alone when he tried to find the answers to natural riddles with physics. Marx tried to invent the fairest economic system using his historical observations. Hitler enforced the application of his half-mature views on the world to make the world 'better'. As human species evolves, there is one undeniable trend that thoroughly is lacking in other species: the pursuit of sensibility. Human always wants to make sense of his world, create theories to push it to higher limit and delude himself in artificial heavens.

While this pursuit is the main force for the development of society, is it still qualified to push the ambition to the extent of denying the existence of all supernatural matters? In this series, Battler tires himself haplessly to explain all the murders alone, but he would eventually find the solution, but not before he receives the aid from the hatred witch. In one respect, this epitomizes the effort of many scientists to solve their own puzzles, but end up getting back to superstition, the natural enemy of science. Umineko indeed puts an optimistic view on science, in terms of how the world would be much better for the mankind once the puzzle is solved by the human mind. Nonetheless, it questions the optimism that science will eventually get rid of superstition completely. Think of Theory of Atom. Think of Theory of Evolution. Think of Theory of Relativity. All these theories were made without elaborated evidences at the time of the creation even though the creators were obviously vivid in their observations and had very sharp deductions. Nonetheless, the direction that science today is going is to make a breakthrough with a concept first, evidence later. When the belief is dismissed by later proofs, too bad. Even the godly Newtonian physics cannot shy from this trend of decline

Moving on to philosophy, Umineko contains numerous classic philosophical problems to the 2D world. The one that dominates the main plot is diabolica probatica, or the Devil's room. In short, you cannot deny the existence of something if in return you can't prove that it does not exist. This argument is today's most accepted standstill of the existence of God. Since both philosophy and science cannot disprove the existence of God, people luckily still have the chance to be both intellectual and religious. Many skeptics break away from this standstill and resort to Occam's razor: it is simpler to believe in the non-existence of an inconceivable thing. Another group of people become the defenders of faith by arguing that it is safer to have a good God in the afterlife (remember Pascal?). The few outside both groups are still dazed, like me.

I arrive at a conclusion after watching Umineko. Maybe supernatural beings exist after all, but their existence is just too way beyond the limit of our comprehension. My assumption is it is logical and possible, although not necessarily easy, to explain everything in the universe which human can perceive. I don't say that our universe is limited to its four-dimensional, space-time relation. This universe might be full of other highly-intelligent beings, but the things we can see and think of are limited to our power of perception. Hence, if any supernatural beings are involved in an event in our space-time universe, the event that is induced by the supernatural beings must be itself natural, in order for us to be aware of its existence and able to conceive it. In short, all supernatural things possible to our observation must present themselves in the form of natural phenomenon which can be explained by our mind. Yes, it is a combination of anthropic principle and Berkeley's tree, with a bit of Kant.

Then, how do I define 'exist'? Surely all things that we perceive have high possibilities to exist, but to say that all things impossible to our observation non-existent? Let's reserve to Wittgenstein idea of language game. Normally, every claim about human action in related to its subject can be explained as 'X exists and X does Y'. For example, I write this blog. Therefore, I make a claim that I exist and I write this blog. However, the context of word 'exist' is different when I say 'aliens do not exist'. The exist in the first sentence reflects on the expression of our mental state. 'Exist' here is our mental desire to claim that 'X should exist'. Therefore, though I will never be sure that the person sitting next to me really exists, my unconscious mental desire claims that he does exists. Whilst 'exist' in the second context is a claim that is formed by our external knowledge. It is more a result of the teaching of our external world. To put it simply, it is like a student who claims that aliens do not exist because his teacher tells him so. However, 'exist' in the second context is not an expression of mental desire independent of the teaching of an authority figure outside our mind. Nobody ever tells you that your parents do exist, but you surely believe in their existence without confirmation, don't you? (probably until someone else tells you that they might not exist)

In conclusion, that is my stand. A miracle is not a miracle when it is understood. Science, which rejects miracles rigidly, is actually full with miraculous theories and assumptions which are further substantiated with reasonable, perceivable and reproducible proofs. A supernatural phenomenon, a.k.a miracle, must become a natural phenomenon, a.k.a not-miracle, in one way or another in order for us to be aware of its existence and able to conceive it. Thus, a miracle is not about whether it is possible to be explained or not; it is about how tricky it can deceive human mind into thinking that it is out of our reasoning.

Moving back to Umineko, I haven't found any single miraculous aspect in this series except the fact that opening theme is half sung in Latin.

Reflection on HMT

2009-07-30T01:13:00.003-06:00

Yeah! After some months, this deserted blog has finally rose from the dead! I've decided to blog more frequently than ever so as to improve my writing as well as enhance my reflective skills.

Today's topic for pondering is the Higher Mother Tongue class. Well, I am so much relieved to manage to get rid almost all emotional tensions and obstacles I've been holding to this subject since last year. I feel longer coerced to do all the assignments, but the innumerable pile of projects and tests affect much to the punctuality of my assignments' submission. At least that is still considerable as long as I put my best (or very near to the very best) effort.

Nobody likes homework. That old maxim of lazy schoolboys illustrates, while the degree is not to that extreme, why a lot of my fellow HMT classmates are aggrieved with this subject. At the rate of at least one composition and one comprehension a week, most students, who now tend to spend their time in the front of their gadgets more than their sleeping time, would find the challenge obtrusive. After doing some personal research, this thing can be anticipated just by creating a well-prioritized time management and sticking to it without failing. However, the real is never as perfect as the form, just like what Plato says; it means more while dealing with procrastination and nonchalant mentality.

Considering priority, some highly critical minds have assessed (although also be largely biased with general opinions) that this subject is not of the utmost importance for the future. It is wise to say that nobody knows what future might bring, but in a highly-organized and systemized system, it makes stronger point to argue that the subject is part of the system, so there are some unfavorable consequences waiting ahead if the expectation is not met. Nonetheless, even some big hearts cannot accept that sort of reasoning and assume confidently that they have their own aces car to excel in the system.

Morally and ethically, it is better to do all the tasks if that is for the sake of empathy, avoiding hurting others and maintaining good relationship with some people. However, the effect of number plays an important role in emotion. Mathematically, x minus x square will never produce a positive result. With this assumption, the good herds on the field still have to withstand to emotional effect the bad herds instill in the shepherd. Being agonized by the communal effect, it is a fretting trial to last in terms of perfection and obedience. However, in this very pragmatic society, would tough people really last longer than tough times do?

Grudges and disappointments recur, but the memories cannot be reverted. Like Nietzsche said, 'even god struggles in vain against boredom.' Would the purity of an aging will be restored? How can you refresh yourself if you have already known the highest limit you can go as well as foresee the collapse of your standard? It would be harder if it involves a bunch of people you work with for granted. The spark to push all fronts to the limit might still be there, but the tenderness might fade, both in the heart and in the brain.

On the other hand, it is sometimes harder to relearn what you have learnt as a child than learn something completely new. You have to be either a mental savant or a tireless worker to achieve the point of eradicating all previous assumptions; the hill is steeper if the process concerns the language of your thought. It is still possible though much devotion and contact with others who are proficient in that subject are required. The question is, is there a room to embrace the latter while your life has been so differentiated and complicated with works and deadlines? It is good to learn by the book, but it is better to learn with a heart, not by heart.

Dazed and confused people might become in this interminable cycle. Actually, a solution for stagnation is very simple: change the way you live. But some people are just haplessly trapped, unintentionally inducing more woes. Moving on to another simple solution, bear with it. It is very lucky that you know when a hurdle is over and you can go to and beyond that point. While it is inexorable to shy from misadventures and tempestuous conflicts, the unluckiest one is never the one who has the key for both sides of the door. The latest point strongly reminds me of the importance of education in the area of succession. How it is pitiable to pray for our ancestors' bones to rise and return to lead us.

With such ruminations, I decide to bear with the HMT class and give my best ability to overcome it.

This Earth of Mankind and Randomness: Prologue

2009-02-14T07:45:00.003-06:00

Finally, I'm working out a fiction again!
I have anticipated stagnation by formulating the entire series for three months! Now, i will start writing out the chapters in a rather brief narration. This story compiles GTA and the Anime Universe with Pramoedya Ananta Toer's Buru Quartet Universe, which takes place in pre-independence Indonesia, to be exactly Surabaya, in 1898, just before the start of 20th century. What will happen and how the protagonist, Minke, the main character and narrator of Buru Quartet, copes up with this development?

PROLOGUE

The day began with the fragrant smell of fresh grass on the vast Buitenzorg farm. I woke up in the morning with full spirit and happiness. As soon as I got out of my bed, I saw the sweet sleeping face of Annelies on the bed. Well, Annelies and I had been... er... sharing the same bed together due to her psychological vulnerability.

To cut it short, let's summarize what had been going in my life for the past five months. I was a Native, a Javanese to be exact, who happened to enroll in the prestigious HBS, the only European High School which the Dutch, the small nation who had been colonizing my country for the past 300 years, erected in order to accommodate proper and 'civilized' education for the young European breeds. Of course, I would not be able to study here if my tyrannical father was not a sort of government official in my hometown, Blora. In other words, I never felt blessed to have such a totalitarian father like him except when I realized that my position as a student in HBS in this busy port city, Surabaya, which the Dutch called as 'the New York of Java'. Should I feel proud? When I found out that I could speak in six languages, I couldn't help my ego to spurt out. I was an intellectual!

Or, was I? Everything changed when this buddy of mine, some half-European half-Javanese worthless romantic (the term of such race at that time was 'Indo'), Robert Suurfhof, invited me to exhibit my courage in the front of a tangible angel. Before getting any details, I was tied in my arms to accompany him to the biggest farming industry (along with the hundred acres farm), which belonged to the Mellema family. They were among the richest European in Surabaya's outskirts, not to mention their nearest rival which was a mysterious Chinese guy who owned an exclusive brothel just next to the Mellema's farm. I still remembered the first time I saw the sign, which told the name of the huge agriculture business, 'Buitenzorg', on a wooden plate near the front high fence.

How did the sinister Suurhof know the Mellemas, who were not so connected to the public? Suurhof made friend with the Mellema's oldest son whose first name was also Robert on a soccer match. In fact, Robert Mellema was the first to welcome us in the Mellema's extravagant mansion in the middle of their continental land. However, that was not the peak of it. Soon, I had a heavenly visage of the most beautiful girl in the world; the girl was far more beautiful than Her Majesty Queen Wilhelmina whom I had been admiring for the past few weeks, though only through her black and white photograph (much to my pride, Wilhelmina and I were born on the very same day!). She introduced her name plainly, but so ethereally.

'My name is Annelies Mellema.'

I would never forget that day.

Well, if you think this is going to be a boring adolescence love story, I have to disappoint you all! After some very nice conversation (and there was practically no dialogue between Ms. Mellema and that prick Suurhof at all!), I got to know the insides of the Mellema family better. They were not as solid as they might seem. At least one fact was clarified; the mansion's security was assured by a group of Maduranese warriors led by the thick-moustache Darsam, who always carried his mythical blade.

Nevertheless, the following experience was far more enthusing. I got to meet Annelies' mother, a Native lady. Her gorgeous appearance, which clearly was inherited by Annelies, and her level of manner, impressed me vehemently. And what surprised me even more was the fact that she was a mere concubine. Moreover, she was a self-learner, taught herself Dutch language and Western manners with the aid of her husband, the Dutch Herman Mellema. Her intellect and never-dying spirit helped to form my fledging personality later on. For me, she was the second most important woman in my life now, only next to Annelies. Her name was Sakinem, but due to her resentment to her natural parents who had sold her to Mr. Mellema, she removed her birth name and adopted the name Mrs. Buitenzorg, or Nyai Ontosoroh according to the Javanese adaptation.

She was still in her thirties, while Annelies was still pure seventeen years old. I soon discovered more about that frightening family. Annelies and Robert Mellema were illegitimate children; they would never become the legal successor to Mellema's wealth. And Herman Mellema was now a psychologically disturbed homeless bum thanks to his legal son from his legal Dutch wife. One day few years ago, engineer Maurits Mellema was assigned a job by the Dutch government to strengthen Surabaya's naval defence. However, his first personal task was not that. He visited the then peaceful Buitenzorg farm to confront the labile Herman Mellema and remind him of his sins against Maurits and his mother. The verbal attack was so straightforward and painful that Herman Mellema's condition deteriorated and he fell for a mental collapse some days later. Largely disappointed to Herman Mellema's weak will to despise Maurits, Nyai Ontosoroh dumped Herman Mellema out of his own house, but he did not resist at all due to his mental disability and sought for refugee and pleasure in his Chinese neighbor's brothel. And he had never come back.

From my observation, Annelies was on Nyai's side while Robert Mellema tended to adopt European's blood superiority theory, thus sided with his ill-minded father.
Everything started to roll out. I managed to build a close friendship with both Nyai and Annelies until Annelies fell in love with me. She became love sick very much until it became detrimental to her own physical health. Mama (Nyai told me I had to address her with that name), who did not want to lose her only daughter and professional farm's manager (that's right; Annelies learnt to be the farm's manager and started working as so since the departure of Herman, and it was quite successful as long as Mama was there), invited me to stay in their mansion permanently. For the sake of the heavens, it was unimaginable. What would people think of me, an ordinary high school student, staying in a mansion under the same rooftop with the most beautiful girl in the world?

I made my decision and accept their request. Annelies soon recovered back and Mama started to confine my life to her miserable fate. Robert, jealous with my presence, ran from the mansion and changed into a bum like his father in the brothel. Some random Chinese-looking plump guy started to frame everywhere. When Darsam, who had been my trustworthy accomplice, found out, he began his wild, rather barbaric hunting. And that doomed encounter finally happened. One day, that suspicious bastard was spotted in the Buitenzorg's field by Darsam's eagle eyes. A heart pounding chase followed; Darsam horridly scurried out with his blade, chasing that plump bastard who had been scared the living daylight out of him; I ran after Darsam, Annelies sprinted after me, and Mama desperately kept us with the rest of us. We ended up in that wicked brothel and to our surprise we discovered the dead body of Herman Mellema lying on the floor, apparently poisoned. That plump bastard was nowhere to be found, neither was the brothel's owner, our Chinese neighbor. Instead, we spotted a pale, dispirited Robert Mellema inside along with a young Japanese prostitute. Robert disappeared soon after Darsam showed his mighty blade.

That was the very start of our big trouble. The European body of law, the White Court, was deeply indicting Mama and me to be conspiring against Herman Mellema with sexual and financial motives. Only uncivilized, barbaric people could do those very shady, atrocious, very prejudicial accusations. Yet, the Dutch, the Europeans, my teachers, the ones who educated me what the meaning of modern age and democracy was, betrayed my conscience by doing only just that for the sake of public's appeal. Our unnecessary trial became a scandalous headliner in the whole Surabaya. Annelies fell ill again due to the great mental pressure so Nyai and I had to exclude and secure her in the mansion. It seemed that those European judges refused to believe that Ah Tjong, the Chinese who owned the brothel, did poison Herman Mellema in order to seize the Buitenzorg farm. Mama, Darsam, his Maduranese subordinates, Annelies, Maiko (the Japanese prostitute), and I were interrogated with so many embarrassing and inhumane questions which implied their suspicion of the existence of sexual affair between Nyai and I.
Things got worse as the trial went on. HBS expelled me for my involvement in such an embarrassing case. I left my youth days without hesitation and turned up to my table, to my pencil and my paper. I wrote dozens of argumentative and persuasive essays about my suffering and how injustice had been acted upon Nyai, Annelies, and I. Yes, I exploited my biggest talent, writing, to defend myself and those who I loved the most. Soon, all newspapers, the Dutch and the Malay ones, were flooded with my writings, with my words of dissatisfaction, my cry for justice and my anger against those judges in the White Court. Nyai fought by hiring the best lawyers with her strong financial backing, though the farm's business had been declining since the scandal emerged.

Months passed quickly. Annelies still lay helplessly on her bed, waiting for a miracle to come to this earth of mankind. I never ceased writing and appealing to everyone's conscience and common sense, including to the Europeans, if they had any conscience upon us non-Europeans. Regarding Annelies, Mellema family's doctor, the kind, sophisticated Dr. Martinet, diagnosed most of Annelies' inner problems. I was shocked when I found out that Robert Mellema had once raped Annelies, causing Annelies to hate all the Europeans and their fair skin and red hair. Dr. Martinet concluded that only I could be her doctor. So be I; I became her doctor, her patron, her brother and at last, her lover, though actually I was at first smitten by her only because of her angelic beauty. I judged Annelies to be very childish, but I could not really blame her since she had been captivated since young by Mama. For the sake of her medication, I had to always stay beside her and even share my bed with her. My life stumbled down into a half-paradise, half-inferno situation. On one side, I had to excruciatingly baffle all the invalid accusations in the trial and attempt to win the war; on the other side, I lived as Annelies' dear lover, her prince in her dreams. I had to fit that image as close as possible.

Fortunately, our gloomy days soon subsided. The trial was closed with us as the victors after Ah Tjong reluctantly agreed that he murdered Herman Mellema and even persuaded Robert Mellema to join his side. Ah Tjong was sentenced to death, while that plump bastard's whereabouts was still unknown. Robert Mellema had sailed out of Dutch East Indies and only God knew where he was going. Annelies' health automatically recovered with this good news and our happy days came again. The farm's business had risen meteorically thanks to the media publication of the farm during the trial. And guess what? HBS offered me to continue my study again. Of course, I accepted that and returned to be a normal high school student like in the good old days. The difference now was Annelies was on my side now and I had diffused totally to be a Mellema's family member now.

I donned my uniform as I reminisced the sweet and sour past. How time flew so fast until the light itself had no idea where its alpha and omega is. Recently, Annelies and I had been officially engaged and we would marry soon after I graduated. I retrieved back my high grades in HBS like before and studied diligently every day for the final examinations.

'Ah, Mas,' Annelies slowly lifted her head from the pillow and rubbed her eyes, 'you have been ready to go?'

I replied in Javanese, the language that Annelies and I used when we spoke to each other due to our intimacy, 'Yes. Do you feel tired? You easily wake up earlier.'

'I guess so.' She opened her arms, waiting for my morning hug and kiss.

I bent my body forward, hugged her loosely and kissed her smooth cheek shortly. 'Don't force yourself into work if you feel quite unhealthy. Tell Mama. I'll be going soon, so see you in the evening.'

As I was about to take my schoolbag, Annelies thrust her body and lazily lounged on the wall. Her thick, dark hair crowned her naturally pretty face, making me want to kiss her all over if only I did not remember of school.

'Why are you looking like that, Mas?' Annelies cutely muttered to me. She was smiling so splendidly that I had to grab the door's knob to withstand this flame of passion within my heart.

'I just admire you too much, I guess. Well, ciao, my dove,' I waved my hand as I stepped out of the room.

CNY in Singapore: Nothing but a Name?

2009-02-01T09:27:00.004-06:00

At last, I have the opportunity to post my thoughts on this blog again. This one would be another short note, mainly ruminated during the last EL2 class in which I didn't get many chances to speak about my ideas.

There is a popular view that the Singaporeans regard CNY as only a break from their hectic life. Celebrations and ceremonials, such as Lion Dance, are rather considered as mere communal activities, if not tourist attractions. This quirky and rather hasty critique on Singaporeans seems to be another reflection of common cynical image of the people of this rapidly growing first world country. Indeed, foreigners, especially from countries who still acknowledge the importance of festivals to the level of the symbolic meaning, such as China and Japan, would likely remark on the apparently indifferent festive attitude of the Singaporeans. Having said that, such contrast can be argued as the gist of the problem. Hence, the differences lie on the socio-cultural environment in Singapore, not some particular inherited traits of the people.

Firstly, Singapore's lack of territory has already cornered the possibility to hold a grandeur celebration. As we know, CNY requires majestic show off of prosperity and hope for the auspicious following year, symbolized in the giving of 'hangbao' and parade of fireworks. Unfortunately, the size of Singapore as a mainly sole island has fixed the proportion of public facilities to amusement area. Marches of lanterns and Lion dancers are supposedly implemented so that the villagers can roam across the neighbor villages and spread the filial greetings. There are no such contours of land in Singapore; even Bukit Timah is used for natural reserves. Blowing up various sparks in the air would threaten the stiff metropolitan buildings and airplanes, as well as hindrance to military defence, which is the pillar of Singapore's primary survival.

In the smaller scope, HDB system has reorganized each family in Singapore to be mostly nuclear family. While the essence of CNY is to gather and celebrate together with the grand family, many Singaporeans have their relatives apart in other countries. Either Malaysia or Hong Kong would be the same. Traveling with any means would cost, something that the Singaporeans are widely aware of. The nearest choice is to swipe the food in the nearby night markets and cook them. Otherwise, restaurant and fast food centers are largely available in this land of investment. With the most prominent tradition of CNY, feasting together with family, fulfilled by those considerably adaptive circumstances, the Singaporeans' mindset of a gargantuan family loiter has dwindled to be as narrow as a HDB flat.

There's a saying that one burger, not two, is enough to make your stomach not empty. The Western influence in Singapore is relatively stronger than any other Asian countries whose natives are far from having brown hair and blue eyes. The phrase of 'New Year' in Chinese New Year has figuratively, and almost literally, been taken by the January the first New Year. The Chinese New Year celebration, which is regulated by a complicated system of Chinese traditional solar-lunar calendar, has incidentally fallen around January to February, which is approximately 20-40 days from the 'formal' New Year. Hence, the spirit, the resolutions and the spiritual need for the celebration has already faded. People do not need the gap between 'New Years' to be as short as 20-40 days, since in this swift modern life, they intend to care for more physical and material issues.

Chinese New Year is still a new year, but its main purpose has been largely forgotten. Singaporeans, though many of them are direct descendants from the mainland, are not that reminiscent after new generations have been born along its 40 plus years of independence. In fact, in the international map, Chinese New Year, which has been spread all over the world, is a short reminder on how the Chinese people have at least one fifth portion of the population on this planet. Name may change definitions, but it never lacks impression.

Obama: the President of United States of Media

2009-01-29T08:42:00.001-06:00

Just a quick note on Obama's wondrous fame in his campaign days and first days in the Oval Office:

The media proudly announces Obama's extraordinary approval rating in his first day as the 44th President: 70-80%, in huge contrast with Bush's constant number in the same context for his last year in the office: 20%. The rhetoric master President has also acquired 500 thousand USD, about two fifth from his campaign website, even in the days of the (almost) second Great Depression prior to the election. Columnists of 'classy' magazines such as Times and the Economist used the extent of their vocabulary of accolades to highlight his message of change over the denounced Bush administration and the experience of a Vietnam War veteran. The culmination might be the inauguration as Time's Person in the Year. Tireless to show Obama's elegant pose in every edition's cover for the whole year, the Times editorial time might yet to seek for another trend. Automatically, the second and the third and the fourth contenders of the prestigious title fell for Obama's main opponents, including the dubious Sarah Palin. Well, Palin might have spoken more to the world with her lascivious fashion style rather than the belligerent Ahmadinejad who prefers bugging USA with nightmares of his lascivious nuclear weapon lifestyle.

Nevertheless, let's look back at November 4th last year. Obama succeeded to bring McCain's lifetime dream to an end, arguably, rather sweetly, since the margin between the two contenders as not as big as their age gap. Obama won by 52%; a margin of 2% is not to painful for a difference of 200 thousand USD in budget and presentation skills.

On the side note, the attendance of the President's real inauguration in the Capitol did not reach as many as expected. Despite of the media's boost of 3-5 million, 'only' one million appeared in the first place. The reason that the toll didn't reach as many as Obama's pre-presidential speech could be due to the quality of his speech in the inauguration, which mainly discussed about facts and possible steps ahead, rather than hopes and changes.

Can I Help You?

2009-01-04T07:47:00.004-06:00

This is a fiction written for the Commonwealth Essay 2009. I want to take a different scope and perspective of the meaning of helping people, which does not always reimburse the helpers very nicely.

A new morning shone on the hills of Hueta. Jose Tanaguchi skirted lazily past the narrow alleys up to the school complex.

His bleary eyes glared furiously for the very loathsome first day of school. Smoking a Marlboro cigarette surreptitiously, he reached for the silver lighter inside his blue jacket’s pocket. As he snatched the tip of his beloved belonging, he rubbed his temple as if a mosquito has stung it. His dark hair was hanging down loosely over his picturesque face, which had won him so many girls in his high school’s life. Countless number of girls had flooded him letters of adoration; all mentioned his saturnine blue eyes and thick, mannish eyebrows. The demure lips slanted while his hand twirling the lighter skillfully. The nose swelled across the fragrant meadows. Tanaguchi swiftly flung the lighter to the air, eventually resting back to the pocket.

His charming figure soared shy whispers and moans among the female students who were trudging calmly on the same road. The nonchalant Tanaguchi only replied their secret adulations by grinning insolently, his eyes winked in some occasions.

Other pedestrians, which were the envious boys, grunted and swore softly as his tall body swerved directly to the school gate. However, the envy was bound to be but verbal. Nobody could stand his well-built, muscular body, especially those thewy arms of his. And even if he had to flee, his athletic records would tarnish all hopes. Those slim but sinewy young two feet could cover 100 meters in only 9.8 seconds.

Finally, he reached his class and sat haughtily, much to the contempt of his male classmates around. The high Gothic-styled school building was teeming and hooting with their soundless whispers. Their brains were surely spinning hard to answer this three years unraveled riddle: who can grind this captain of basketball team’s vanity?

***

‘Queer Tarantino.’

The voice was incredibly flat and the pale face was deferential. The new transfer student that Tanaguchi’s form teacher just introduced was fixing his gaze blankly straight to the backside wall.

‘Look what we got! A nerdy jerk! Somebody should indoctrinate him!’ Tanaguchi mischievously mumbled to his classmates. That newbie should be aware of the school’s hierarchy, thought Tanaguchi. Most of his classmates retorted silently with contemptuous sneers over his faces. Only the girls were chuckling furtively, ludicrously elated by Tanaguchi’s pugnacious proposal.

The girl beside him snapped his forearm and smirked alluringly.

‘Why would you waste your time to bully him, dear? Better wrestling with me,’ the bewitching young lady winked her brilliant eyes.

Tanaguchi grinned wryly against his latest date’s suggestive rhetoric. Certainly, any normal boy in the school would like to grip your ethereal heart, Tania, mumbled Tanaguchi. Tania was a definite contender for this year’s prom queen. Her long dark brown hair over the creole ravishing face could easily clout every man’s dignity, including the Casanova Tanaguchi, who was enchanted by her lovely red lips and faultless hips. He leered at her briefly before rolling his eyes back to the dank sight of Queer Tarantino.

‘What’s in a name?’ Tanaguchi recalled the famous quote. In this newbie’s case, that question was certainly silly. Tarantino, conveying only his name, proceeded to plod past the students, who were observing him like a protected species. The newbie’s peculiar charm had spellbound the whole class, including Tanaguchi who disliked his role to be seized. Tanaguchi contemptuously squinted one eye to examine him. The boy was short in stature, even shorter than Tania. With almost no hair over his head, he hung his thick octagonal glasses eerily over his vast, oily forehead. The face was square cold, with pallid lips as pale as Tanaguchi’s skin.

However nothing amazed Tanaguchi better than when Tarantino ceased plodding in the front of his chair.

In an aeon, Tanaguchi felt disturbed with the nerd’s sickening gaze at him. Soon, the gaze slid to Tania’s beautiful face. Tania, avoiding all prejudices, replied with her usual sweet smile.
Tarantino stood lifelessly like a mannequin in the front of her smile. Neither excitement nor shock shadowed his poker face. Tania’s smile faded as Tarantino didn’t release his gaze at her. Fright and nervousness replaced.

‘Can I help you?’ shrieked Tanaguchi to break that queasy silence. Tanaguchi hastily stood and thumped the table after noticing fear in Tania’s face. The nerd didn’t flinch at all.
‘I want to join a club,’ Tarantino muttered morosely. ‘For God’s sake, is there any life inside this humanoid?’ grunted Tanaguchi softly. He shrugged his shoulder and lessened the angry tone in his face.

‘Well, can you play basketball?’ suggested Tanaguchi amicably. He made the gesture of throwing a ball upward. Tania inched backward with her light brown face become paler than usual.

‘I reckon, yes.’

Tarantino turned his head around and commenced walking stoically to the seat he had chosen, which was the farthest seat from the front. Tanaguchi patted Tania’s quavering shoulder as a consolation, then sat back.

***

‘Jose, are you freaking sure? Recruiting that weird nerd into the team?’

Tanaguchi’s vice captain interrogated Tanaguchi imperiously. Hearing such a peremptory inquiry, he put his lunch box on the round table in the canteen and munched furiously.

‘I’m not! I just don’t want that nerd scares Tania!’

‘You’d better not sacrifice your team for your personal business, would you, mate? That queer boy surely scared the living daylight out of anyone in my last Chem class.’

‘What?’ Tanaguchi’s eyes widened with interest as he was quaffing his cup of tea.

‘That dreadful Mrs. Perkins, yeah that bulldog, scolded him for mingling up chloral hydrate with tapped water. Few seconds later, she fainted in the front of his upset face.’

‘Really?’ Tanaguchi seemed not considerably astonished. ‘That’s purely coincidental.’

‘I hope so. See you in the field.’

The vice captain rose up and waved his hand at Tanaguchi, who gave him no reply. Tanaguchi packed his bag and walked jauntily to the class.

***

‘Hurl that ball, moron!’

Tanaguchi shook his hands vigorously, waiting for a magic to have Tarantino’s fixed grip on the basketball worn out. Since five minutes ago, exactly when Tarantino received the ball from the vice captain, Tarantino had clutched the ball tightly without any willingness to pass the ball further. The rest of the basketball players on the school field had relentlessly attempted to seize the ball from him, but no one could match his bizarre strong grip, though Tarantino’s arms were the least muscular of all.

‘It’s your fault, Jose.’

The vice captain sighed as he swiped the sweat on his face with a rag. After taking a deep breath, he surged forward to the stoned Tarantino, his arms flung strongly to snatch the ball.
Tarantino only dragged his eyes slightly to the pacing figure.

The bold march was suddenly halted. The vice captain stumbled to the ground and stopped breathing. All the players gathered around to revive the heartbeat of the fallen vice captain. CPR was automatically executed. Tanaguchi was unable to react. Seemingly petrified, he sullenly watched Tarantino trudging forward with the ball in his arms out of the field.

***

‘I can’t, Jose. You’re sending me to my death!’

Tania shouted clearly, expressing her sharp disapproval. She glared madly at Tanaguchi, who was roaming nervously across the shoe lockers, obviously losing his sangfroid.

‘But dar… darling,’ stuttered Taniguchi. ‘It’s just crazy! That bulldog Perkins and my best lad in the team just got heart attack instantly after trying to confront him!’

Tania slapped his face hard, jolting Taniguchi’s bulky body backward. As tears started to burst in her eyes, Tanaguchi returned and embraced his future prom queen.

‘Tania, I just want you to date him once, that’s all! It’s not the end of the world.’

‘But if it turns out he has black magic or something?’ sobbed Tania, inconsolably pouring her warm tears into his chest.

‘I’ll back you up, honey, I swear! Now, go and ask him to come over your house.’

Tania released her hug and cupped Tanaguchi sourly. She then bolted away through the corridor with a pang of sobs.

Tanaguchi could only gloomily stoop his head.

***

Several hours later, a bicycle parked in the front of Tania’s house.

Tanaguchi lurked silently inside the underground secret tunnel in the back yard of that rumpled wooden house, which had been his love nest for few last months. Sheltering his hair with his hoody, he intruded through the house with a lantern to enlighten his path. The hard rain outside had already soaked half of his body. In his pant’s pocket, there was a bottle of arsenic poison.
Tania had not reported in two hours, reminisced Tanaguchi carefully. That darling bud of his should have blabbered about Tarantino to him. Did the date fail, or Tania uttered something that offended that nerd again? With that awful prediction, Tanaguchi was drenched in sweat. He bustled edgily through the dim tunnel, looking for the familiar crevice around. Gritting his white teeth in the damp, musty tunnel, Tanaguchi envisaged the harsh, glacial and pale face. Who is this man? How could he clasp the ball very toughly? How about the awkward circumferences that surrounded him?

Recalling the scheme of the house perfectly, Tanaguchi protruded to the first floor and set all the contemplations aside. As he took off his hoody, a terrible sight startled him.

Tania was sprawling motionlessly near the stairs in her complete school uniform. Tanaguchi, perspiring even more profusely, hurried to check his hapless lover’s pulse. There was a slight pulse in her wrist. He nearly cried over the pale red lips of that beautiful damsel. Hence, there was no hesitation.

He marched to the kitchen, trembling exuberantly, eyes wet and fixed to the front. Wandering for a while, he located the blade which Tania’s grandmother used to mince pork. Surlily, he wrenched the blade along its scabbard then scuffled back to the stairs. His heart nearly pranced out of his chest when he bumped into someone.

'Can I help you?' Queer Tarantino’s quiescent voice pricked the fright out of him.

He instinctively dodged the presence of that slovenly inscrutable figure. With all his veins throbbing, he clenched the blade out of its scabbard, snarling furiously with bestial glares. A horrific scream followed.

***

Few minutes later, the somber rain was ebbing away. A puff of chilly summer breeze hauled Tania out of her trace. She staggered laboriously to the kitchen, which was full of grim red liquid traces, a bottle of her diabetes medication clutched in her hand.

1750 words

How Do You Win A War?

2009-01-03T07:31:00.001-06:00

Pardon me if this short article doesn't cover the wide scope the title attempts to display.

I just want to show my concern about the recently going-on inhumane mass killing in Palestina.

Let's be brief. Hamas had been bombarding Israel with rockets and ricochets since few months ago, disturbing the tranquility of the Israelis. Eventually, the remorseless assaults surpassed Israel's patience. A similar offence began in the same arena where Hamas had been exploiting against the Israel: the murky gray sky of the Gaza Strip. Probably, I guess though I've never been there before, the most polluted atmosphere on this earth of belligerence, since it has been fouled by countless wars since 1948.

The Israeli government's alibi to the world is (I guess you'd be bored to read this) their intolerance against the naughty, pugnacious 'terrorists'. The ideology of 'having all the land from Sinai desert to Dead Sea for ourselves' of the Hamas just makes Israel flutter. Moreover, Hamas is said to have stabbed the Israel's back (literally) by violating their latest peace treaty. Nonetheless, according to a BBC article, there might be another alibi, a more subtle, political one. The incumbent Israeli government needs the support of Israeli people, notably the hard-liners Zionist, to keep on ruling. And the promise is tangible in the form of their New Year Eve's gift: proud Israeli airplanes and bombs.

On the other side, Hamas attempts to display its helplessness to the world. Shrewdly following the history, Israel was successfully lured into assaulting the Gaza Strip, where dozens of innocent civilians settled in fright for years. Taking advantage as the 'victim', Hamas promotes Israel's barbarous and abhorrent measure and relays the same old, irrational message of hatred against the Israel.

Prejudices and nascent hard reactions all over the world are inevitable. The big question marks is located over the measures to overcome the conflict. The Big Uncle Sam, unfortunately, seems not that big at all now. Economic recession is consuming the pocket and mentality of the Americans, along with the rise of Russia, China and India as the new world economy superpowers. It is unlikely that such daring actions that Bill Clinton showed in the middle of the 1990's would be taken. The wad of cash and economic resilience of other countries are fading discernibly.

However, that does not exclude Washington from being verbally active and shrewd. President-in-elect Barrack Obama noted that 'If somebody is trying to send rockets to two my children at home, I would do my best to stop it.'

America's closest neighbours, the European nations, are generally in a quandary about their attitudes toward the conflict. Some leaders have given sharp remarks. Germany Chancellor Angela Merkel openly criticized Hamas' changeless violent stance. On the contrary, some young activists from France has commenced the remonstration against Israel's negligent offence.

The victims, the hapless Palestinians, are still crying out loud for harmony and understanding that are as far as the moon to the earth. Unnecessary blood and gore are still shed out of their pitiful dead bodies among the remnants of their dilapidated hopes for better future. Peace is absolutely demanded as the top priority of both belligerents. World figures and celebrities are roaring for the ultimate serenity.

How does one end this conflict? Surely, someone has to win. Then, how do you win the war? Let's clarify it by ruminating on how does one win a war. There must be one side that compromises with its opponent's demands, to some extent. The party who wins would usually gain more advantages than the losing one.

Looking back at the Gaza Strip's context, both parties are not free from the hard-liners with rigid ideologies which are sworn to destroy each other: the Hamas and the Zionists. Geographically, both hard-liners intend to nail the Holy Land with a complete conquest, and a complete exodus or humiliation on the opponent party.

Can one ever compromise such two stances that are of direct opposites to each other? Let's attempt to see through those hard-liners' views. They were born with hard and violent disdain, grown up with examples and sight of it and are now employed to succeed the bloody line. Unless their future generations are reeducated with decent and balanced views of the Holy Land, this vendetta would never end. However, this tradition of extreme nationalism is hard to cut since the hard-liners use the vague and pugnacious interpretation of two powerful religions: Islam and Judaism. Religious arguments are easier to fathom and relay; many people would devote their lives for faith.

It is not the dead of a thousand of kings that continues a war. The psychological lost is the main reason. In a settled war, those who do not feel to be the winner would automatically sink mentally as the loser. Being a loser is a psychological concept. Forgetting the inferiority and hatred, as well as the superiority and arrogance, would solve the winning-losing mentality.

Look at how humiliated France was after the exile of Napoleon Bonaparte. Are the French people still holding insurmountable grudges against the British? Look at how tarnished Germans' ego was after the Second World War. The current generation of Germans would surely not opt to train special units of terrorists to bomb Moscow and London.

What hinders the peace to exist in the Holy Land is the way the new generations of Israel and Palestine are educated. Prejudices and selfishness in the mask of piety are hard to get rid. More significantly is the ubiquitous sight of violence. Surely the kids of Palestine and Israel would adopt hard ways as the correct path of life if they have seen blood oozing very early in their life?

The ego and contempt of both sides are still far away from complete eradication. What is going on now is roughly the execution for the sake of that ego's satisfaction. Both sides are balanced and almost equally matched. What lies in the middle are chains of victims, Palestinian's hapless civilians.

Can this showoff of mass killing be the unconscious competition between the two hard-liners to defend their ego? It is plausible. It is possible when no victory can be scored from direct humiliation of the opponent, the number of kills become the decisive factor to triumph. Therefore, it may be coincidental for the hapless Palestinian civilians, who happen to be in the middle of the conflict, to be unintentionally sacrificed.

Let's hope someone can quench that dreadful ego, for the sakes of those who have been clumsily murdered in the Holy Land.

Injury Time: Victim of Remorseless Exams

2008-10-04T23:11:00.002-06:00

I think I'm really asphyxiated this time.

I've abandoned this blog for some months. The reason is very clear: EOYs.

No, I'm not mugging anytime. I've been bored and tired to mug now. What I really need to do now is to hibernate and contemplate.

This entry would be the last entry before the EOYs are over, I think.

By the way, I enjoy myself lately by watching videos at YouTube, mostly music videos. Trying to get some new sound, I review old Indonesian songs and some alternative rocks.

I have to tell you this: those songs don't make any difference to me.

The rhytm is still the same. The chords are repetitive. The bass line doesn't overdrive my hormones to dance.

It looks like I have to turn my head to jazz now. Really!

Moreover, I found a cool video in YouTube just now. This video is especially dedicated to my batchmates Deedee and Dustin, also not forgetting Agus Antono and the coming junior, Lukas Adi.

I really have to admit that BL rocks! Having said that, please check 6:56.

I laughed all the time....

Crazy Ads

2008-09-06T02:02:00.003-06:00

We rely too much on computer. To what extent is this true?

2008-09-04T06:34:00.002-06:00

Another school essay which I think should fit inside this blog though I think it is not so specific.

One of my friends who studied in a school in Singapore once had to do an online assignment. The procedure required him to print the question paper. Nothing seemed troublesome until he had to print his answer sheet. The school’s computer lab was already closed, so he had to use his own laptop, which he never had. The deadline forced him to madly seek for a computer.

The next day, which was the deadline, he was doomed to meet no computers at all. He hopelessly attempted to explain to his teacher on why he could not submit the assignment on time.

‘You rely too much on computers’; the teacher’s explanation broke his heart. ‘You can just write it on a piece of paper and hand it up to me. That would be fine.’

My friend is not alone when it comes to completing a task in this modern era. Due to the ubiquitous computers, we tend to trust them to process what we want to do. The seductive power of computers relies on its two main attributes. Firstly, they can perform numerous tasks at the same time, or multitasking. This essence totally excites our world that is spinning so fast that time has never been enough. The second is the ability to unite people all around the world. With the aid of Internet, a thousand of miles can be covered up by a single click. Everyone is more connected than ever with websites, emails and instant messengers.

Furthermore, the power of computer is synthesized with the power of economy. Such power is indispensable to connect a company to the world and bring the world to the company. Every worldwide corporation is said to have an average of two hundred thousands of computers. Moreover, it is almost impossible to calculate bank deposit using a conventional calculator as well as present your ideas without using slides. Though the machines cost extremely high, they are the core of modern economy and marketing.

Next on my list, the power of computer can transform an individual to be a part of the world, from a sole person limited by time and distance to an avid contributor to the community. Once one has dialed the Internet, innumerable resources and possibilities are waiting for him. A student may be too reluctant to scrutinize every bookshelf in the National Library to find the book he wants. Even so, he would not reject, most likely, to just open Google.com and type the keywords. Astonishingly, the computers have provided chances for every of us to save information as well. There is no restriction for students who feel they are capable to edit online-encyclopedias. Even they can store the tedious tales of their trivial days with blogs.

An old proverb says that a man falls in love with his eyes and a woman with her ears. Perhaps, in terms of current days, they both fall in love with their computers. It is obvious that more people prefer searching for friends in the web to socializing face-to-face. There is no need to walk and talk when we can just tap and click. Social networking has been so influential for its freedom of expression and loose limitations. To have no identity in the virtual world can mean missing big chances to establish relationships which are needed to survive in the global world.

One may argue that the reliance of computer depends on where and who you are. If you are a farmer in a third world country, you would pay no attention to Facebook and Youtube. However, if you are starving, you can always ask for your friend from the city to report your anguish. Your suffering may invite UN’s charity money to compound the national deposit and your village map on the Google Earth.

To summarize, computers are inevitably necessary in the world’s economy. Since almost everything needs money to work, computers become automatically the most efficient tool to indulge with. Communication, entertainment and business can be mixed and obtained with them. As this step means information has to be stored and shared together, computers grow its other trunk to become a gigantic library. The stoic machines extend their hands to education afterwards.

Yes, people nowadays desperately need the powerful computers. The reason is not only because they intend to catch up with trends, but also it is a prerequisite to receive their salary, and grades for some students.

Back to my friend, he was lucky to have his teacher ignored the assignment. The teacher wasted one full period trying to recharge his laptop’s battery.

Computers are extensions of our body to grip the soil of modern rapid society. But it is important to remember our hands can perform more than just typing and clicking.

793 words

Some Unknown Google Pages....

2008-09-03T19:42:00.003-06:00

Just for fun! There is no offensive means in posting this article! Moreover, I know these tricks from other websites, so if you want to find the actual sources, just google 'google secret pages', alright?

1. Open google.com/microsoft
Is there anything interesting?
If not, try to type 'google' as the key word.
See what the search results are about...

2. If you are a BSD lover, you can just try www.google.com/bsd
And the other one: www.google.com/linux

3. Some comicstrip for your pleasure! --> http://www.google.com/dilbert.html

4. If you are an economy maniac and willing to analyze Google's finance: http://investor.google.com/fin_data.html

5. This is something that all Internet historians must read! --> http://www.google.com/corporate/history.html

6. Your Easter gift! --> http://www.google.com/Easter/feature_easter.html
Not forgetting your Valentine's Day gift also! --> http://www.google.com/heart/feature_cons.html

7. Some reasons why Google is the heaven for any employers in the world --> http://www.google.com/support/jobs/bin/static.py?page=about.html&about=top10

8. For those who cannot live without knowing EVERYTHING: http://www.google.com/press/funfacts.html
and
http://www.google.com/press/zeitgeist/archive.html

9. The lifesaver, Google without ADS! --> http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&lr=&safe=off&output=googleabout&q=Google&btnG=Search+our+site

10. Nice photo albums:
http://www.google.com/googledance2002/1.html
http://www.google.com/googledance2003/index.html
http://www.google.com/plex/event.html

11. Alternative Google Interface:
www.google.com/intl/xx-hacker/
www.google.com/intl/xx-elmer/
www.google.com/intl/xx-piglatin/
www.google.com/intl/xx-klingon/

12. For the American patriots:
www.google.com/unclesam/

13. For those who seek oblivion:
www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=+&btnG=Google+Search

14. EXTRA! These pages are not created by Google, but can be found as fast as a thunderlight by using the 'I'm Feeling Lucky' button! These are the keywords:
- find chuck norris
- french military victories (this one is not meant to be serious!)
- google goth
- google bart

Alright, all! Hope you enjoy your day with googling around!

Some Valuable Sharing by My Friend....

2008-09-03T07:00:00.002-06:00

It is not easy for someone who is suffering from leukemia to survive and keep his life spirit lighten up. Especially if you have undergone surgeries twice for the same reasons. Even so, my friend, who has the same age with me, has proven that for any limit, there is always someone who wants to push it to the whole different level.

For a story of a life replete with struggles for health, which is usually underestimated by us due to our perfect body condition, and some biology enrichments about Bone Marrow Transplant, please open this blog:

Christianto Perdana's Blog

Have a good read!

The End of the Olympic = The Beginning of a New Global Race?

2008-08-27T00:37:00.007-06:00

51 gold medals plus special a commendation from UN Secretary General Ban Ki-Moon are only the small pieces that China receives after the Olympics. The rest of the pieces are, unfortunately, restless critiques; at least that is the very obvious impression I get after reading the Western media. This kind of distrust and political attack, though very latent, reminds me of the competition between the two world superpowers in 1980s, then USA and USSR.

USA and USSR seemed to seek for a way when they could show their sharp teeth to each other, and partially show who was more suitable to be called the strongest (only partially, since the nuclear arms threat still persistently existed). In 1984, USSR boycotted the Los Angeles' Olympic,indirectly raised USA's gold tally to above 80, the highest ever seen in the last 30 years since China opened its economic bamboo curtain.

Now, only four years after USA led the gold tally slightly ahead of China in Athens, China shouts loud its roar that it is ready to be the next world's superpower. USA and Russia fell gradually in the medal tally. This 'China's global ambition', as Western media puts it, seemingly drives the Western media not to recognize the achievement and effort that China has put for this Olympics.

International journalists recounted on how the Internet access is still censored in China when they could not post their writtings freely. Following these complaints, the Western media interferes and points at the dictactorship system that China never wants to let go. This system is certainly against the 'free-world' ideals, which are the ideals that Western world uses to cultivate its influence in every corner of the world.

China is also said to have copied the Soviet's system of training atheletes, the Juguo approach. This approach demands high budget on breeding the young talents for the future. The government's fixation of gold medals have shaped the characteristic of the Chinese to be overachiever and ambitious. A report states that even a Chinese provincial newspaper criticizes this system because the high budget could be used for education instead. The sacrifice of education for the sake of prestige is emphasized by the Western media as the comparison with the USA's atheletes breeding system. Some Chinese atheletes are potrayed to have less-than-happy childhood due to the strict training. In addition, USA allows their atheletes to get their rewards without a large portion cut for the government.

In my opinion, these commentaries are quite one-sided. I infer that it is a sign of paranoia of an overthrown king of Olympics, which is the USA. It needs something to blame, and since they cannot blame on their people due to their principles, they express it by annoying China's pride which is reaching the highest peak right now. Praising the awesome atheletic facilities and preparations, they attack on the other side which is less obvious: the human rights. Internet censorship and the condition that almost all Chinese people's economy has not improved since the Games become the main issues that are red marked by the Western media. The impression that I get is mainly that the Western world still compels China to follow their life-style and values.

I mainly agree that China also has some hidden objectives besides promoting International friendship. The gold-medals fixation also seems to exist to some extent. For example, the Chinese government spent a lot of money on the fields of sports in which USA is traditionally weak. China also tries hard to improve the fields they are particulary weak in, notably track and fields and some water sports. The first strategyseems to succeed more than the second one. It is a sign that China has been preparing to knock USA down by balancing USA's strength.

We should also remember when a top Chinese track and field athlete failed to finish the 100 m hurdle because of the unpredicted leg injury. The Chinese media reported the miserable event like a national tragedy. The failure covered the headlines of the local newspapers. I opine that this widespread publication of an unfortunate failure to be morally deteriorating for the athlete himself. It can be called as harsh for the athlete who actually had known that his leg would not work well before the race. He has no option since he holds the national pride on the field of sport that China is traditionally weak, track and field. While the other gold-winning athletes happily receive their 51000 USD price, this athlete should receive the same appreciation. If China's government does this, then it can erase the detrimental claim that all that glitters in China's mind is gold medals.

Even so, I still regret that the Western media has forgotten the main issue of human rights only for defending its prestige. The Tibet issues have been largely abandoned since the beginning of the Games. There are no activists protesting while the Games were progressing. They are all busy to watch the medal tally, I suppose. After the Games, the Tibet issues are only mentioned in one over ten headlines; meanwhile, months before the Games, it dominated about 50% of the headlines. If this Tibet issues is a real concern for the Western world, so big that even some EU's Head of States rejected to attend the Olympic Opening Ceremony, why is it so easily forgotten after the real battle of ego began?

Having said that, I assume that the Olympics really mark the start of a new global competition between USA and China. China has the upper hand now by showing to the world what it can do and how much money it could spend to create sucha mesmerizing opening and ending ceremonies. USA tries to defend the claim by pointing at the poor democracy practices in China. Well, we can never judge which people, the Chinese of the American, is the happiest and so on. This really depends on different mindsets. Reflecting on historical and cultural backgrounds, China and USA surely have very distinct mindsets.

As Usain Bolt breaks the sprint world records twice and Michael Phelps wins eight gold medals, a new race, more rapid and hard to be seen one, emerges in the stream of globalisation. Ironically, there is no winner in this race if none of the both sides ever want to learn from each other.

Sources:
1. http://www.spiegel.de/international/world/0,1518,574504,00
2. http://www.economist.com/world/asia/displayStory.cfm?source=hptextfeature&story_id=11985394
3. http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/olympics/
4. http://www.economist.com/agenda/displaystory.cfm?story_id=11998511

Size Does Matter

2008-08-04T06:45:00.005-06:00

I felt like a tortoise hobbling along this path. My mind was numb after fruitlessly contemplating so hard to write RE Group Reflection. CCTs and cruel tests are coming and I will have no enough time. NO enough time!

However, I still manage to draw a simple spontaneus comparison using the most beautiful mapping website (at least, if you have no alternative other than this thing), Google Maps! (is there something to be celebrated?)

It is purely simple. the idea is to compare the area scale of my previous school, St. Aloysius Batununggal in Bandung and my current school, Raffles Insitution in Singapore. I found out that my previous schools only covers the same area which is only covered by the RI's Rugby field + Astroturf! At this point, I consider RI is very, very big.

Here is the photo. Both are taken on same scale (according to the machine):

Yeah, you can easily see the comparison. This is stunning and amazing.

Thank you, Mr. Larry Page!

East Coast Trip

2008-08-02T07:21:00.005-06:00

A short relieve in the middle of CCT weeks. Hope I really had fun there.

Crutch and Crutches

2008-07-30T06:55:00.003-06:00

The cane was still here
to accompany me to a grave
It was a friend of mine's grave
but grieve paid no price to me

Thunderous storm swamped the vicinity
Vicissitrude had drowned the quagmire
The ragged wall of a massive gale convulsed
While everyone else was swept out,
I was confused

The tombstone cracked
The earth vigorously shoke, beating all the odds
A shallow figure rose surreptitiously

Oh, no!
It was coming!
Its mouth gaped widely!
The door of the hell was opened ajar!

The frivolous face of mine peered,
hoping it was all a dream

Yes, it was indeed
But that was the last time I could feel the breeze
there was a crutch stabbing my ventricles

This time, I did not want to hobble anymore...

Random Tunnel

2008-07-25T06:51:00.003-06:00

Anyone knows where and when?

A Supposed-to-be Spooky Story

2008-07-24T09:56:00.000-06:00

Life is a mystery. As I trudged very slowly across the deserted little road to my apartment, I was pondering and pondering. Many events occurred so fast in the last two months that I could barely recount all of them at this moment. My eyes were pointing to the muddy steps that soaked my shabby leather shoes, but they were staring at something far beyond. The gentle wind carried my mind away from the place where I was walking to a place nearby. It was a place where all my gratitude and happiness were buried together. Deep inside the fresh soil, there lied the decomposing body of the one I loved the most. Everybody suggested my delusion was very common for someone who had just lost his fiancée last week. However, since she was gone, time had been rolling so slowly and every minute when I was recalling my sweet memories with her felt like eternity.

Anyway, life is supposed to go on. It was too strange to notice the reaction of the people around me. My colleagues in the office venerated me for being water-tight against this tragedy. On the other hand, my family had to hire a philosopher-consultant to cheer my sole soul. However, nothing affected me. Being cheerful to life had been too irrational for me. I chose to indulge myself in innumerable tasks and deadlines to keep myself away from the cruel memory. I had to stop asking ‘why’ and ‘what if’. It was time to move on.

I was near to the giant Banyan Tree who had been standing there even before the birth of this nation. With its enormous roots whose contour resembled snakes in some ways and huge, recalcitrant trunk, I never doubted that it was the true survivor, not me. My feet detected that there was a hole in my shoes. I could feel the muddy water from the wet soil coming in and causing me to shiver. I put my arms across my chest, tried to keep myself warm, but I ended up staggering. Suddenly, there was something inside my mind urging me to surrender. I was about to fall to the ground when my blurry eyes immediately noticed something.

There was a translucent silhouette of a figure of a man under the Banyan Tree’s titanic branches. Though everything was vague, I still could identify the long hair that covered up the figure’s head. The hair was very long and uncombed as if it was never washed for hundreds of years. The rest remained unnoticeable. Furthermore, I thought that the figure was so short; perhaps the figure was sitting on the gigantic roots. My nascent curiosity aroused. I could not help myself to approach the figure. I inched one step while contemplating what the use of accosting someone in the middle of the night, then I stopped my way. Hesitation, angst and suspicion mixed my rational judgment. My body was too vulnerable to anticipate any criminal offences if that figure turned out to be something very unpleasant. I deemed not to directly greet the figure but to lurk to the near bushes to observe the figure more. Hence, I crouched and very quietly swayed my ankles to the front. As I attempted to strengthen my left leg, a very terrible thing happened. My cell phone dropped to the wet soil from my trouser’s left pocket. I nearly shrieked but luckily I could shut my mouth. The sound of gentle splashes of the water spill could be heard. My phone was then soaked and might be spoiled just now. I twiddled my arm, extended my left arm to grab the miserable phone.

Suddenly, I could hear the sound of the steps of the people stamping towards me. The figure was roving to my frozen body. I could not express what I felt at that moment. My nerve was strained and my body vigorously trembled. A mysterious chill spread over my skin and it caused the hairs on my skin to unpleasantly stand upwards. The figure was getting nearer. I became more nervous. The figure was only centimetres from my body now. What could I do? Fight or flee?

Everything changed soon after the figure became more visible. It was a woman, or at least it looked like a women if I still remembered what a woman looked like. This stranger accosted me, waved her hand to me who was watching in astonishment. And I could hear her soft voice rumbled rather unclearly.

‘Excuse me. Do you have any idea where we are right now?’ she mumbled.

For an aeon I had no answer. I was still absorbed with her presence. Her voice touched my conscience and memory. I roamed back to check whether I knew that beautiful voice or not and terrible ended up with the figure of my fiancée.

‘Sir, are you alright?’ she asked me louder after I stoned.

‘Yeah... I... I mean... I am... alright... Miss....’ I stammered. My body was still wobbling.

‘Could you please help me to find my way to the main street?’ she implored with the most luring voice I had ever heard this century.

I could perceive her body’s shape and her arms resting on her waist now, but I was still unable to see her face. The night was too dark without the moonlight. The air was then arid but it deterred me to gaze clearly. I was too weak to reject her demands. After all, nothing was wrong to accompany an unlucky girl only as far as to the main street. I could turn back and still be in home before midnight.

‘Okay, Miss’. They were the only words I could say.

I quickly snatch my wet phone, put it inside my pocket and stood tall. She was a bit shorter than me. I could observe some of her hair resting on her shoulders. Her hair really annoyed me for it was very messy and so peculiarly long it covered up most of her face. I continued to scrutinize her from head to toe. She should be around my age, probably a university undergraduate who was studying in a university nearby. Her body was beautiful and slim. I was fascinated to learn that she only wore a simple pink tank-top to cover her torso. Her yellow skirt was dirty and full of nodes, probably muddy soils. The skirt covered her smooth and long leg. I knew what was going in my mind at that moment. I was imagining her as.....

‘Sir, can’t we just move on now?’

I was shocked by her sentence. It woke me up from my wild fantasy. I vigorously nodded my head and started to walk to the direction of the main street. There were no words left to speak. Though my bare feet were tortured with the cold muddy water, I somehow found energy to walk. She was following behind my back. Her aura was so strong that I lost my confidence. All the ordeals and misery evaporated. What was going on now was me, responsible for the life of a woman that I just met, leading her to the main street. The sky was still dim without any stars, but I found passion and guiding stars inside my heart. Unreasonable happiness just sneaked in and gave me hopes: hopes beyond any hopes....

She was still trotting behind me. I could barely hear her steps and often looked at my back to check whether she was still catching up with me. She seemed to acquire a pretty good sight, better than mine. I still could not identify her face but I thought she was smiling sweetly every time I looked at her. Though her hair was in a chaotic condition, her body smelled a beautiful aroma that tranquilized my mind, like the aroma of a garland. How long had I not been admiring the wonderful smell of roses which were the best thing ever exist on this earth?

Finally, we reached our destination, the edge of the main street. I turned my body back and faced her. Our eyes met, flying me far to the skies and brushing all my wounds.

‘Thank you for accompanying me here. I am so fortunate to have a gentleman like you to protect me. I know the direction from this place and I think I can finally find the way on my own,’ she spoke with such an irresistible charm.

‘Are you sure you do not need my company now?’ I asked, a bit disappointed to know she preferred continuing her journey alone.

‘I reckon I can make it.’

‘Okay. That means... it’s a goodbye then.’ I grumbled softly so I hope she could not notice my disappointment.

Unpredictably, she moved closer towards my ears, lifted her head and whispered.

‘It is not the place where either you or I will be alone. When you are still trapped in the shadow called the past, you are always destined to be not there.’

I could not understand what those words meant. What I knew was she quickly disappeared somewhere to the windy road. I only blinked my eyes for a second but she was gone now. How fast she walked compared to when I was with her just now! I even had not asked for her number. I turned my body all around, seeking for her prominent figure to appear somewhere in the middle of the road, but found nothing.

I checked my pocket to locate my phone. It was not there. My mood quickly changed again. I rushed to search all over my body for the phone. I rigorously shook my weary shirt, pant and even took off my shoes. The phone was not there.

I suddenly received a glimpse from my logical mind: the woman was a thief! She deceived me to walk together with her so she could find the opportunity to steal my phone. My God, what a stupendous feat she had done! How could I be so easily tricked by such a stranger? And why did she choose me? I was still languishing and now I had to experience a big lost again. I had no enough money to purchase a new phone.

I cursed and vibrantly stamped my feet repeatedly on the road. My mind was occupied with suspicions and worries while my body unconsciously brought me away from the main street. I totally had no idea where I was going, but it seemed that my body automatically headed somewhere.

I found all the answers of that night only in a minute. I felt like I kicked something on the ground, so I bent my body downwards to check it. It was my phone. Yeah, it was truly my phone, definitely. And there was a ring lying beside it. It was a gold wedding ring. I could recognize it because it shone although the night was very dark.

I snatched the ring and clutched it tightly to my palm. I opened my eyes to identify the characteristics. The shape, size and material seemed to be the same with the ring I wore in my left hand. I raised my left hand to compare. The ring was surprisingly identical to mine. I had totally lost my attention to my phone right now. I continued to try to read the engraved words on the ring in the middle of the darkness.

In a heartbeat, I was shocked and petrified.

There were my name....

and my fiancée’s name....

Random Poem

2008-07-24T02:40:00.005-06:00

There was a woman

Aching in sorrow

floating on the sand

thinking of tomorrow

Moseying around the cold corridor

apart from splendour,

Eyeing vigorously through the bleak space

trapped in endless maze

'Miss, dead is on the way.

Miss, dead is on his way.

Miss, dead knows all your ways.

Miss, dead's the fastest way.'

In vain, she was heard screaming

'Enough! All my amulet,

all my dignity...

Hell wouldn't resolve

when you know the taste of a brothel.'

She collided, collapsed and choked

with tears

without remorse

The grin was still on her face.

What Does Belonging to A Community Mean to Me?

2008-07-17T00:18:00.006-06:00

This is another reflection from the English social advocacy project. The question seems to demand my own understanding of the functions of community, so I give one function which I think is only present in the human community and makes human beings different from the other creatures.

No man is an island. The necessity of collaborating with those who share some common features with an individual have been existing since the first living creature was formed. Deterring detriments and the potential of obtaining more resources are the basic rewards for the members of the community. Therefore, all living creatures outside the human beings should also benefit from their own communities. Though it seems plausible, it is easy to notice the big gap that is created due to one thing that is only present in human communities: culture. Hence, there ought to be additional features in human communities which contribute to the development of culture, which gradually arise the human position as the dominators on this planet.

Modern biology has attempted to explain the altruistic behavior with the ‘selfish gene’ theory. As altruism seems to contradict the notion of natural selection, the subject of evolution has been deduced to the genes. An individual is potrayed as the genes' survival machine and the behaviors the individual possesses are the genes' survival strategies. Community and altruism are developed concerning that the others share some similar genes with the individual. Hence, the innate motivation of altruistic behaviors is only the self-gratification of his own genes, though the actions taken are selfless at the individual level. The purpose of community is therefore to contribute to the upmost for the uttermost benefit.

However, the introduction of culture shows a new aspect the human intelligence evolves: the awareness of preserving ideas. Community serves as the media of accumulating the ideas about the world that each individual has. The ideas are kept and recounted throughout the generations. This concept is indeed started to fulfill physical survival, but it eventually transgresses to the point where human curiosity plays as the main factor. Human beings think not only to find better ways to survive, but also to discern the relationship between human and nature and among the human beings. It leads to the inventions of languages, systematized knowledge and tools which are not attained by the other species.

Therefore, the purpose of human community extends from mere genes survival to the intellectual means. Hence, despite the maximum contribution for maximum gain, belonging to a human community can also be defined as the process of preserving and improving ideas. No man can live for thousands years, but some ideas can if recorded properly and practically beneficial.

(397 words)

A Commodity Called Human Organ

2008-07-14T03:06:00.003-06:00

The human organ market has been a disruptive controvery lately. When there are more and more patients waiting helplessly to receive new healthy donor organs, the government sticks to the current policy that this kind of transfer is banned. There comes a philosophical problem whether a human organ is a part of its owner body; therefore, it should be regarded collectively as an indispensable part of a human being and cannot be owned by other human being.

I want to note some obvious problems first concerning the transfer of human organ. Firstly, the health issue. The recipient cannot just accept any organ for there is a big chance of incompatibility that will only prolong the disease and possibly cause unwanted death. However, since the biological technology has been so advanced, such a case is kept to the minimum level. Singapore, as a developed country, has emplyed dozens of medical experts who should be able to recognize the right organ to the right patients. This issue is actually more bothered to the cases of the smuggled organs because usually smuggling deals with people less than legal experts whose concerns are mainly about money. Hence, such a smuggling case is unacceptable not only according to the laws, but also the issue of humanity.

Secondly, there is the economic factor that usually motivates the donors to give their important belongings to other people whom usually the donors even never know. The statistics from some Internet websites show that most of the donors are economically insufficient. They do not find other solutions but organ donor to resolve their financial problems. This issue is more complicated for it also deals with humanity. It should be the government from each related countries to prevent this case. Though a man still can live without one kidney, his body's metabolism will be bothered by the hardwork by one kidney only. Furthermore, since the nutrition is not much considered by the poor people who have to persevere every day to only get a spoon of rice, the poor donors would become very prone to illnesses. Moreover, it is a tragedy to see young poor people to donate their organs only due to economic problems. While their bodies still lack of proper nutrients, their bodies stability is aggravated with one or more organs missing. It can cause health problems that can ruin their prospect for the future.

It is also interesting to note that very few Singaporeans who are not obstinate to donate their own organs while they are alive according to a Strait Times polling. The statistic result proves that economic level is the driving force of the organ donors that are previously used only by the people who are close to the patients.

A very unique scientific perspective that regards human body as a natural machine can also be seen here. Human organs are being sold like the hardwares of a computer in the white and black markets. Transplation becomes as easy as modifying computers.

On the other hand, we can also assume that our organs never become permanent parts of our body. As we know, the cells in the human body constantly die and are replaced by the new cells. Those cells are the building blocks of our very own organs, so we can deduce that our organs are also changing from old materials to new materials gradually. It happens to all organs except the brain. Since brain is not known of being able to be donated until now, we can assume that our organs are not formed with the same materials as they will be in the next ten years. Of course, this process will cease to happen when we are old and that is one reason why we die in the old ages: damages that are not repaired in our organs.

This perspective can be used for the sake of the organ market supporters. They can claim that the organs will be totally theirs years after the transplantation process, since the whole cells that build the organs are totally reformed by the materials produced by the recipients bodies. The organs now only serve as expensive properties which are required to survive. And it is everyone's rights to acquire survival in that way as long as his/her account is not blank yet.

This issue becomes more bleak as the religious views are quite vague. It is highly regarded if one is willing to sacrifice a very worthy organ to another person so that person can continue to live and fulfil his/her prospect in life. Even so, it is reprimanded to take benefits from the organs transfers as well. It is a conventional problem of 'playing God'.

Personally, I support the government's stance to limit the human organs market because of those reasons. Smuggling and illegal corruptions are still existing and not completely settled down yet. However, the policy should be more flexible if the situation draws that organ requests become higher.

I think the real ethical issue lies on the money problem. The news lately report the presence of organizations that manage the organs sellings. It is still discernable if the money is used for the sake of the donors who are economically poor or even destitute. Nevertheless, if the money is used by the organizations to gain profit, it can be seen similarly with slavery. Slavery slashes humanity by regarding a human being as a thing. In this case, it is not the organ that is regarded as the human being. It is the unlucky donors who are persuaded to risk their own health and life due to the financial problems. Those donors are then regarded as a spare-part kit that can deliver the parts by luring them with money. This is totally savage for our world that is so-called 'the free world'.

Besides that, the traditional view that human body is highly valued as the most perfect creature ever designed by God is still strongly adopted by the society. Meanwhile, the development of technology gradually destroys that view by showing that human body can almost be understood in the way that a mechanical machine is. Well, I think that this scientific stance is still vulnerable for the scientists still cannot explain what consciousness is and what part of brain it deals with (scientists reject to discuss the definition of life; for example, in the book called Selfish Gene, Richard Dawkins state living is only a term in the English vocabulary that represent some particular conditions that are attributed as being alive).

A new law should be constituted to tackle this problem. Most importantly, there must be clear distinctions between the human organs and the other commodities that are legally marketable written on the new law. This issue should be settled quickly as it can harm the humanity.

Reflection on the Democracy Project

2008-07-07T06:29:00.004-06:00

I have spent some minutes to post my latest reflection essay on the democracy for the SS project. Hope that my essay-making ability is improving....

Democracy is a relatively extolled-word in the English vocabulary now. The essence of democracy, freedom, has been largely spread all over the world. To some extent, it creates conducive environment where the government would have an equal check-and-balance power. Democracy is a good solution to limit the government power when the state’s policies are bringing the nation into destruction. As the main actors of democracy are the people, I opine the intelligence level of the people in a nation play an indispensable role in deciding the success of the democracy.

I am definitely against the USA worldwide democracy policy due to its hasty assumption that all nations have been ready to practice the USA democracy style. Democracy will only aggravate the circumstance of labile or belligerent countries. Following the majority without further consideration only leads to the bandwagon fallacy, which can possibly intensify the problems. The intellectual level of a nation must be carefully examined, whether it is deeply influenced by a particular ideology or it still lacks of proper education. It is similar to a parent who lets his child to jump from the rooftop due to the number of the voters. However, it does not mean that the people with less education level like the farmers or labors should be ignored. The future prospect of the suggestion must be considered even if the input comes from the ordinary people. Even so, the judgment ability is mostly acquired by the educated people.

I also reflect that the persuasion power can result horrendously. In the election, people will tend to choose the most convincing ones. Even USA is brave enough to put an inexperienced senator like Barrack Obama as a president candidate due to his ability to promise changes. This does not always lead to problems, but history has proved democracy can be corrupted. The rise of the Nazis was started by a democratic election. Whether the people are going to follow the charismatic leader completely or ponder the promises suggested by the leader largely depends on the critical mid of the people, which would lead back to the level of the education and intelligence of the people.

Democracy is not always the best way to create stability due to its flexible nature that encourages changes from the people. However, it can synthesize quite well with the concept of the stability, as long as there is an authority which assures the existence of the human rights. The rights of speech cannot be traded with the rights to live. Democracy should be granted gradually by the state as the intelligent level of the people increases. Authoritarianism sometimes costs ideas supported by the people, but it can deter riots cause by immature opinions of the people. A newborn state should prioritize education for the people while maintaining the order; hence, the nation can execute democracy quicker and ensure it is delivered in intellectual ways, not through bombs and destruction of stability.

Democracy is a great power that comes with a greater responsibility.

Child in Time

2008-07-06T07:22:00.002-06:00

Cool! That is the most precise word I can find for describing this song. Using the Am scale (with some touches of blues, aegean and ionian sclaes), this song purely expresses the almost-unlimited improvisation capability of a super-metal-group called Deep Purple.

What I like the most is (of course) Ritchie Blackmore's solo. Full of colours and techniques. he may never use tapping, but his fingering is just going around as fast as a F1 car. The second best is the tickling Hammond organ riff by Jon Lord. The melody is funny to be heard but also an awesome achievement to dissolve chruch organ into a heavy metal song. The rhytm section is also solid and powerful to change the seasons and moods of the song, from grieve to abstract despair and anger.

However, the best of the best is Ian Gillan's deadly cry. Outstanding and outrageous voice! I cannot comment more on myself.....

The lyric is extraordinarily peculiar too:

Sweet child in time

you'll see the line

The line that's drawn

between the good and the bad

See the blind man

shooting at the world

Bullets flying

taking toll

If you've been bad,

Lord I bet you have

And you've been hit

by flying lead

You'd better close your eyes

and bow your head

And wait for the ricochet

Everyone is Connected, isn't it?

2008-07-04T20:46:00.004-06:00

Everyone is an should be connected. At least that is the ideal of the network. The rapid development of technology has made it possible for human to save most of the hours in a day to relax and think about the others. Automation allows people to escape broing daily works such as cooking and washing clothes. The AI-powered machines are available to satisfy your primary and secondary needs. Now, they also give you almost unlimited facilities to connect to anyone around the world. The success of virtual world depends on the convenience and practicality that the computers provide. In the last 2 centuries, the scientists have been competing to invent handy gadgets that permit the users to perform multi-tasking.

If we trace back the history of the virtual world, we will meet a horrendous starting point: Cold War, which is a nuclear-armed deadly competition between two superpowers at the moment. ARPA and ARPANET, ancestors of Internet, were used to connect military bases all over the USA and its allies' territories with the database in the big universities. To fortify the new-founded network, the American scientists chose to attempt new method of communication line. Radio waves are definetely vulnerable to the Russian spies, so they selected the new satellites to transmit the data. It was widely supported since USA had been successful in its late space mission, notably after successfully landing men on the moon. From this point, we can see that the basic of all technology is merely for survival. Indeed, it is still relevant now. The fastest and most powerful computers in the world now are still owned by the military, not by personal users.

After the war threat reduces, the purpose of technology gradually changes into life's convenience. The USA found that their technology was too advanced and would be wasteful if used only for military purpose, so they began to open the network to the universities students. Thanks to some briliant scholars, the public web is formed in the mid 1980s. The HTML and HTTP were introduced in the 1990s and Netscape took the giant step to create a program to access it in the IBM personal computer. The world of Internet for the public has been born.

In the beginning of the 21st century, many briliant inventions have been made in the web. Search engines such as Yahoo and Google start the public addiciton of Internet. Internet has been transformed into a big library where everyone doesn't need to scrutinize each shelves to access the information needed. The second great invention is the internet-based e-mail. Based on the classic concept of telegram, the e-mail is the key point why the Internet is so popular now. Other sites, such as blog, mailing list and social networking sites, follow and use the e-mail account as the identification code of each individual.

Besides those sites, a great advantage of Internet is that you do not have to be yourself. You do not need to input your green card number in the real life to be able to create an account. You can always hide your real name and your real age. This ability to create a new identity for yourself is a relieve for most of the people who deny the reality which is never perfect for everyone.

However, if you are able to use fake identity, is it still proper to call Internet a form of communication? To pretend to be someone else and give false information is a form of de-communcation, I guess.

The function of the Internet does not stop at that point. As I mention before, Internet has been a great library that cans ave any kind of informations. That also means anyone can claim false informations to be true in the Internet. We can never know which site is dependable since Internet is open for everyone. Trustworthy site can modified by those who are experienced in the technical side of the Internet (we usually call them 'hackers').

Maybe I would put it more correctly that Internet is actually a neutral tool of sharing informations and connecting people. Due to the technology development, it is getting more powerful and more influential. It has reached to the level that it can infiltrate anyone's life and distort the priority of life of many people. People are connected with Internet. Yes, connected with the Internet, not the real other people. Do not forget that when you are on the Internet, it is the AI machine that you are really chatting to, laughing to, and blaming to. Internet is our external sense that can deceive us everytime. Moreover, as it gets more complicated, the accuracy of Internet is also descending down. The more important a thing is, the bigger the chance you get fooled with that thing. Hence, when the Internet has stolen your life priority and become an indispensable thing in your life, you should be careful and more cautious with the content of the web.

The real connection between people is still the direct interaction using our body, not our artificial body. If you want to make sense of the real world, that is the best way to express yourself. It may be not convenient, but at least you get better acurracy. I'm not saying that your internal sense never deceive you. I'm also not against the virtual world.

The real logical paradox comes with this article. When I urge, or let's say this article which is seemingly written by me, that Internet should not be trusted as you trust your sense, this information is also not worth enough to be trusted. This is like saying 'I'm telling the truth that I am lying'. This is a logical contradiction. Therefore, which one should be trusted.

Better put it this way. This article is typed and published by the website that is located in an Internet server, not by me. I am only the one who inputs the data to the Internet. I only tell the machine to produce a writting that I want to be published in some manners. Afterwards, it is up to the machine how it is going to put my article on my web, since I trust the website to code the rest instructions and I don' want to know further about the real coding. And you, the readers, are accessing this information. The information that you read is the output from several codes from the main server. It is like DNA replication; the main purpose is accuracy but there is always a slight change in each output, though with the help of the technology, the distortion is getting smaller. Nonetheless, how if I, as the writter, put some instructions to the machine to tell the wrong information? It is unjustifiable to blame the machine for spreading untrue informations. Internet is a ethereal nest of spammers and liars.

Remember, each time you are chatting with somebody, adding a friend in Facebook or downloading the information from school website, you are not interacting with the real person. You are communicating with an intelligent machine that translate your inputs into codes then process it to provide an output in the way that the program behaves.

Everyone is still not connected by the virtual world then. Everyone is connect with binary codes in the form of cute words and pictures....

What happens when science challenges established beliefs and vice versa?

2008-06-24T06:51:00.002-06:00

This is actually a school assignment for History Performance Task. This individual reflection shortly reflects my paradigm of relationship between science and society, and between science and religion. Here is what it goes:

Science is indispensable in every civilization’s advancement and dominance. Through the ages, the theories and inventions of science provide crucial material for the nations to rise as the major power in their time. Even so, it is not rare that science often emerges by contradicting and eradicating the old beliefs.

It is better to recall one important principal of science: there is no absolute truth except mathematical truth. Based on this premise, science can help mankind to have a better understanding of nature using careful observation data and mathematical deduction. Therefore, it is not strange that science frequently crashes with established beliefs such as religions, whose premises are sometimes lack of empirical evidences and logically contradictive. Nevertheless, religions usually rebut by claiming that human mind is not perfect to contemplate the whole universe.

However, it is important to point that scientists are liable without good financial support and protection from the reigning political power. Before the Industrial Revolution, most of the rulers used religions to maintain the order in the society. Revolutionary scientists were often compelled to face accusations, becoming martyrs like Socrates and Galileo. Strangely, those actions usually decreased the rulers’ popularity, as science turned up to be a simpler and more logical solution that improves life quality. This is the most frequent result of the battle between science and old beliefs. Science devotes itself to this statement: nothing is eternal but changes.

Knowledge is power; the greater freedom that mankind gains from science have loosens the sophisticated moral and traditional rules. Unfortunately, science has also been contaminated by several pseudo-sciences that claim to be pure sciences. Hitler’s racial theory based on Darwinism sociology is a horrible example of how science can devastate humanity. Moreover, Hitler’s case has shown how science has been extolled as the truest of the true by the modern society. Science has become the new god.

While effort to unite science and religion has been largely backfired, it is better to admire the two for the sake of diversity. Harmony between faith and reason would be a celebration of what human mind can do.

One More Time, One More Chance

2008-06-23T07:26:00.004-06:00

Let's just say that it is only a side phenomenon that some boys here have after watching 5 cm/s (including me, only a half actually...).

This song actually conly consists of three parts: the verse part, the chorus part, and the very short intermediate part. Each part consists of the different chord progression, all in A major. What attracts me about the chord progressions is that they are quite unusual as they reach not only the harmonic scale in major and minor region, but also some strange chromatic combinations (for example: the pressence of F major in A major after descending from B minor). The verse progression also includes the strange but harmonic Aaug chord, which prvides a good variation even though the melody only uses the usual major scale.

The instruments used in this song: accoustic guitar (rhytm), fingered bass, drum, electric organs and strings (orchestra arranged). The arrangement is quite good thought it is a bit boring. The organs are really not dominant and hard to hear, whereas they can improve in some parts of the song. There is also an electric guitar, but it is only played in few short parts and playing bass progression. The synthetizer arrangement is excellent, strengthening the melancholic impression fo the song. The rhytm secion is quite solid, though the drum can still add more variations.

The singer and songwritter, Yamazaki Masayoshi, provides a good lead vocal by using his melancholic, bariton voice. His breath is actually not too long, but he overcomes it with good breathing techniques and clever deception melodies.

Okay, the review is enough. Here is the English version lyric:

If I lose any more than this, will my heart be forgiven
How much pain before I can see you again
One more time, please don't change the season
One more time to the time when we fool around

When our path cross each other, I am always the first to turn
Making me indulge more in my selfish way
One more chance tripped by memories
One more chance we cannot choose our next place

I am always searching somewhere for you
Opposite of the house, the other side of the alley's window
Even though I know you won't be here
If my wish is to be granted, please bring me to you right now
Betting and embracing everything
To show you there's nothing else I can do

Anybody should be fine if it was just to ease loneliness
Because the stars in the night sky seems like falling, I cant lie to myself
One more time, please dont' change the season
One more time to the time when we fool around

I am always searching somewhere for you
Even at the intersection and dream
Even though I know you won't be here
If miracle was to happen, I want to show it to you right now
A new morning, myself
and the "I love you" which I couldn't say

Summer's memory is revolving
The sudden disappearance of heart beat

I am always searching somewhere for you
At dawn's town, At Sakuragi street
Even though I know you won't come here
If my wish is to be granted, please bring me to you right now
Betting and embracing everything
To show you there's nothing else I can do

I am always searching somewhere for your fragment
At the destination's shop, At the corner of the newspaper
Even though I know you won't be there
If miracle was to happen, I want to show it to you right now
A new morning, myself
And the "I love you" which I couldn't say

I always end up looking somewhere for your smile
At the railway crossing of the fast pace town
Even though I know you won't be here
If life can be repeated, I'll go to you many times over
There's nothing else that I want
Nothing else is more important than you

Injury Time 1.4

2008-06-23T07:07:00.005-06:00

What a record! I have not opened this site for nearly 1 month!

I really lost real inspiration to write. If there is any, that would be Euro 2008.

Euro 2008 is the real entertainment for me. It totally displays the unpredictability of football. In 2004, the Greek army, powered by the spirit of their nearly-godlike ancestors, such as Aristotle and Sophocles, lifted the trophy after beating the hot-red Portugal team. This year, they didn't make it to the semifinals, but there is another team that replaces Greece.

The descendants of Ivan the Great. The nation whose people were courage enough to wipe out their long-reigning monarchy after a glorious modern revolution, the second in the history, next to France.

Russia.....

The army of Tartars and Cosack, only currently dressed in their national football uniform, marched to the semifinal after beating the deadly Dutch.

My main reason for this almost-impossible victory is the stamin that is left inside the Dutch players. They surely had hard times to devastate World Cup-champions Italy and runner-ups France, both with scary score margins. Against the Russia, who saved energy during the qualifications, they were liable.

I am so bored with the routine football leagues such as EPL and La Liga. Everyone can rpedict that the champions will be either ManU or Chelsea, either Real Madrid or Barca, either Inter or Juve, and so on.

Nonetheless, financial power doesn't play in Euro 2008. Nothing can buy nationality in football until now, except maybe the luck that the Germans have to own Lukas Podolski inside their troop instead of Polands'.

The shameless peacock Cristiano Ronaldo can only hide his face now after the magnificent game against Germany. It is proven that Bastian is the best player whose number is 7. Let's flasback to the Third-Winner game in World Cup 2006. The indispensable Bayern Munich midfielder outplayed the Lusitanians, socred two and set up a own goal that brought Germany glory.

I don't want to comment anything on England. Just shameful and embarassing. And if the plan of the FA is accepted, the EPL will be held all across the world in the next 5 seasons. Is it still correct to call this expensive competition English Premier League? Nowadays, it is replete with non-English European players, non-English managers, non-English owners. The fantastic statistic will be boosted by the fact that the competition is no longer played on the English soil.

Football is getting distracted and distorted from its original meaning. It has been a mini game of investations and one-night fame arcade.

Remember, the laws of probability still exists in football. The strongest does not always win. In football competition, I conclude that the most constant and stable in form (of course top form) is the most dangerous one. Beautiful techniques and goals are the products of a stable good form.

Therefore, no arrogance and imbalance should be allowed for the good football. Or is it?

Anyway, let's continue to predict (and prepare to be shocked) and enjoy this wonderful once-in-4-years competition! Let's see who is the best and who only whines about their best....

Does the M18 Sticker really help?

2008-05-29T06:35:00.005-06:00

Human seems to be really interested in imitating reality in the form of video games, especially the dark side of reality. They pack blood, gore, and even sex inside a video game who can be freely bought by the children. Moreover, to pack sins inside a simulation world is not a sin anymore. It is a beneficial commodity which causes fever to all game publishers all over the world.

Some years ago, maybe there were only maniacs who were addicted to Nintendo's Poker Strip game. However, the video games don't depict nude girls in a poor and rough picture of 256-colour VGA anymore. 3D model has successfully imitated the real figures very similarly. Hologram may follow in the future.

And your weapon is not limited to super punch like in the classical Super Mario. You can purchase bazooka to hit a building. You can hijack a commercial airplane thus strike it to a tall and important market building to eradicate a nation's economy. Perfect training for newbie terrorists, isn't it?

After some many censor system and banning attempts done by either government or independent organizations, the children still cannot be dodged to access the copies of mature video games, especially with the plague of pirated yet cheap copies. In Singapore, the new M18 system was just introduced. Sounds cool, but actually the only update is only on the warning sticker.

I really doubt that the video game sellers would consider the presence of the sticker, except if the sticker covers up the whole case perhaps. The big label that says M18 will mean nothing for we cannot judge the maturity of a person roughly from his/her physical age. By selling various options of games to the 18-years old and ahead, those people who are qualified by age can quickly turn to be maniac gamers thus forgets their studies and/or jobs. They have more things to do compared to the 18-years old below children.

That kind of half-reluctant violation will raise a child's curiosity even higher. A child who is interested in buying a particular game can just ask an older cousin or friend to storm inside the store then purchase it on behalf of them. In this liberal society, who cares of the psychological development of the children? The store teller, even the most moralist one, will be unable to detect any possible route that leads the selling of the restricted games to immature consumers. Furthermore, with very loose control from the parents, the children cannot help to try to play a game after seeing his brother/sister playing.

The latest hottest case is GTA IV. GTA is a very unique and addictive game because it offers almost unlimited possibility to explore a imaginary metropolitan city and perform activities there, mostly related to crimes and offending law enforcers. This core feature of GTA is enough to attract many youngsters, especially those who rarely hang out and want to explore the world without the observations of their parents. Rockstar Games, the developer of the game which has been made into a successful series since GTA III, lately added more controversial features such as sex and more offensive language. What can you expect from a game whose protagonist is a felon who just escaped from Eastern Europe after a quarrel with a local syndicate there?

M18 label on GTA IV's case is very insufficient to prevent more children from longing to this game. This game will attract faithful fans and new young gamers to buy. Dark online sites and pirated games store can be the backdoors for the children to buy this game. And the parents have to be more and more worried about their kids.

Besides, the sticker only brings benefit to the stores. The price of the game will be up for some few dollars if there is a M18 sticker on it. Isn't it a smooth extortion? Yes, if the advertisement of the game is very intense and exposed to the public including the children. Yes, if the trailers of the game are still being uploaded in YouTube. The immature children will just assume that this game is the same as the movies that are premiered in cinemas, such as Iron Man. It is different. Nevertheless, how many parents have told their children that video games are not benign threat?

Why doesn't the censorship department just ban the game if it is inappropriate with the culture of the country, especially in an Asian nation when the people still hold high the moral values? It is a simple solution. Can I say that there will be a loss of revenue if the game is totally banned? Who cares! Dare we trade our future generation's characters with cashes that are used just for now?

Don't be astonished if you see a small kid playing a spanking cool-new-cool GTA in their sibling's PSP. Don't be shocked to see nobody wants go to cinema to watch Iron Man anymore because they can watch movie from artificial cinema inside the game. It is the reality that we are inside the game of rude marketing that sacrifice everything for temporary benefit. The game's name is laissez-faire and it is indeed not fair at all.

More links:

Newslink - Strait Times Archives:
http://newslink.asiaone.com/user/OrderArticleRequest.action?order=&_sourcePage=%2FWEB-INF%2Fjsp%2Fuser%2Fsearch_type_result.jsp&month=04&year=2008&date=29&docLanguage=en&documentId=nica_MY_2008_8674779
http://newslink.asiaone.com/user/OrderArticleRequest.action?order=&_sourcePage=%2FWEB-INF%2Fjsp%2Fuser%2Fsearch_type_result.jsp&month=04&year=2008&date=29&docLanguage=en&documentId=nica_ST_2008_8674147
http://newslink.asiaone.com/user/OrderArticleRequest.action?order=&_sourcePage=%2FWEB-INF%2Fjsp%2Fuser%2Fsearch_type_result.jsp&month=04&year=2008&date=20&docLanguage=en&documentId=nica_ST_2008_8608734

Video Game Violence and Public Policy:
http://culturalpolicy.uchicago.edu/conf2001/papers/walsh.html

Injury Time 1.3: Talking with a Stranger

2008-05-27T07:23:00.003-06:00

This is a real and factual event that happened to me on 27 May, 2008 at 6.30 pm. I urge all you guys to take care of yourself and be careful while talking to a stranger, even he asked for your help and looked to be in a real trouble.

I was walking along the street in the Bishan area when suddenly a stranger came to me. He was around 30s, taller than me and clumsy. He asked for my help to get him to Bishan MRT. He claimed that he had lost his wallet in Yishun thus he had to go there. To appeal my sympathy, he added that he is a Malaysian who had just had his teeth cured and he has no relativs and friends in Singapore. I thought there would be nothing worthy only to help him to buy a MRT ticket to Yishun, but the real problem started here. He wanted to eat first before he took the MRT and again, he asked for my assistance (in other words, urge me to lend him money; he promised he would pay back, somehow...).

For information, the way to MRT station is to my right. It would be logical to buy some meals in Junction 8, which is where the MRT is located. So, if this guy's intention is true, he would ask to go to my right, wouldn't he?

He didn't. He wanted me to go to my left; he said that he had a diabetes and pain all over his legs but he asked to go away from the MRT station. Isn't it true to say that this is a sucidial act? How can a teenager like me be responsible if he suddenly collapsed while walking with me?

A blink came to my mind. This guy is a liar. I know the kind of robbers who would appeal your sympathy first before they stab you in the back when he and you are in the middle of nowhere (I mean, the road where nobody is around).

My doubt got bigger when he refused to be given a bottle of mineral water by me. He said he longed for a drink, but why did he reject when I offered him water? This is irrational and going to be wrong. I began to dodge him. He was smart enough to catch my avoidance attitude. He used the reverse psychology to confuse my conscience, "It's okay. If you don't want to help me, you can go."

I was hesitating for a moment. For an aeon, I cared for this guy. I was worried if this guy's situation was real. I would feel responsible and regretful if something bad happened to him later.

I repeated my question again. "Where do you want to go now?" He answered loudly, "MRT."
"Okay, I can buy food in Junction 8. There are plenty of choices there."
"But I want to go to the coffee shop there," he said while pointing to the direction away from J8.
"I don't see your point. Why do you need to go far from MRT station whereas there are many coffeeshops there in Junction 8. It is where the MRT is."
"Okay. You don't want to help me, fine. You can go."

After his last sentence, I left him without any doubt. I was convinced that this guy is a wolf with a lamb coat. Though I may violate my own principals of morality, I should not endanger myself to the edge, right?

Therefore, dear readers of this blog, please do take care! Think logically and in a calm manner when somebody asks for yourhelp. If his/her points contradict each other, don't doubt to leave him/her away. Don't try to be a hero but you end up being zero!!!

5 cm/s

2008-05-26T23:00:00.002-06:00

This is not about the physics stuffs. It is the speed at which cherry blossoms petals fall. A very slow speed it is, but if you do really observe the petals falling to the ground, you will see that the petals will seperate from each other slowly but discernly. This natural event can be a wonderful methaporical representation of the nature of human relationships; how we often start together but slowly turn into their seperate ways.

I am heavily stimulated by an anime with the same name. The anime's main idea is very simple. There are a boy and a girl who have been good friends since they were in the primary schools. Their relationship had grown to the extent that each of them longed for a relationship that is more than standard friendship. Unfortunately, they had to move to other cities as their parents' occupations demand. They lost contact since Sec 1. The male character cannot erase the memory and the unrequited feeling that he has for her. One day, he saw a very familiar figure walking to the opposite direction while crossing a railroad in the city where he and the girl used to play when they were kids. Convinced that the figure is the girl he loves, he turned back to look at the figure. However, two trains passed and deterred his sight. The girl disappeared when the trains had gone.

Though the love story is very touching and tragic, I choose to ponder more on the metaphor. Can this idea be applied to all human relationships besides the unrequited love relationship like the on in the anime? Frightfully, it can. I route my memory to recall all my friends and all the time when I played and talked with them. It feels so easy to forget them though I used to spend all my leisure time together with them. It is natural yet strange to see that all my childhood friends are slowly but surely replaced with my current friends now. I have an extreme question in my mind: what is the purpose of befriending someone if at the end of the day I must walk the different path and get them replaced by someone else?

I also observe the stories from my seniors. They all have the same experience. In their first year in Singapore, they still kept in touch with their old friends in their hometown. Their old friends would like to meet and greet him gracefully when my seniors visited their old schools. As time goes on, the old friends start to loosen their attention and gratitude to my seniors. I think the exact thing will happen to me. No matter how many friends I have made in my own school, my existence will start to rot when I'm no longer besides them. There will be someone else, someone new and unique, who will replace my place in their hearts. Am I afraid to think of that? Strangely, I am not. I also begin to get used to my life now though I still miss the good old days.

Let's say that at this point I assume that my own existence will never be eternal in other's mind. How about the male character in that anime who never forgets of his childhood girlfriend? He despises any possibilties of having relationships with other girls. Will he be like that until he dies or is it because nobody has successfully replaced the girl's place in his heart? On the other hand, the girl can even marry other guy despite her strong feeling towards him (I'm sure that her feeling isn't less bitter than his). Maybe that guy has successfully taken her heart with all his attentions and care, but most likely he will never erase her memory of her old boyfriend. That is why she disappeared quickly when she met him in the railroad. She wanted to avoid any possibilities that her old wound would be opened, thus disturbing and destroying her marriage life.

Besides distance and time, the third barrier would be death. I realize now how old people sometimes suffer because they no longer have parents to give them shoulders to cry on. Does maturity bring the strength to forget the existence of the people who used to care for us when they were still alive? I don't know. Nonetheless, this where I found the irony. Distance and time, those two things that seperate people to their own different paths, make it easier to accept the death of someone who is very close to you. I don't see mature people crying crazily when their old parents are buried. It's different from the photographs of the people grieveing in Sichuan when their young realtives unexpectedly died in the tragic earthquake.

However, there are many cases when people start to regret painfully when their beloved die. This is the point when we are reminded of how uneternal life is. How we often waste worthful chance to express our care and attention.

Nobody can be 100% sure that they will met their beloved ones again in the afterlife. Philosophy will never be enough to ensure or disapprove that claim. I think nothing in this world can. That is why, according to the probability, which is rationale, we should try to avoid wasting all the chance of giving love and care when we still have time to share with the people we love and care.

Maybe or age is speeding slwoer than 5 centimeters per second, but if you look back at the history of human civilization, our life is unbelievably short...

Sometimes I Feel Like Screaming

2008-05-20T05:52:00.002-06:00

A nice song written by 70s metal band Deep Purple. Besides having freaking hip hop chorus in contrast to its ballad opening, it also has funny lyrics:

While you were out...
the message says
You left a number
and I tried to call
But they wrote it down
in a perfect Spanish scrawl

Yet again
I'm missing you
King size bed
(in a) hotel someplace
I hear your name
I see your face

(The) back street dolls and the side door johnnies
The wide eyed boys with their bags full of money
Back in the alley going bang to the wall
Tied to the tail of a midnight crawl
Heaven wouldn't be so high
I know if the times gone by hadn't been so low
The best laid plans come apart at the seams and shatter all my dreams
Sometimes I feel like...

Screaming close my eyes
It's times like this
my head goes down
and the only thing
I know is the name of this town

Yet again
I'm missing you
won't be long
O' coming home
Until that distant time
I'll be moving on

Some Differences between the Cyclone and the Earthquake

2008-05-20T00:16:00.003-06:00

Just want to highlight some differences between how Myanmar government and Chinese government anticipate the huge disasters that hit their countries lately. For those who live in other planets besides the Earth, the disasters that I refer are the Cyclone Nargis and the Sichuan earthquake which happen on May 2008.

The Chinese government, having experienced the snow storm last year, are more prepared. Though the quakes came surprisingly (even there was almost no prediction before), they directly hired the army, the Red Cross, and everyone willing to contribute for humanity to help the victims. They didn't wait until the neighbour countries sent in rescue troops or the Western powers criticized.

We cannot blame them for being late to rescue the dead victims. China has huge population thus it is dense. I once saw a picture of the morning assembly in a school in China. There are not only hundredfold, but thousandfold of students standing with the same uniform in very neat rows. I never predict before that this high density would bring disadvantages. The main cause that there are so many people buried in the same place after the quakes is because the number of the people is so high, yet they are concetrated on one particular building, such as schools. I believe that even the most skilled and fastest rescue team in the world couldn't save all the victims. We should appreciate the Chinese people and government's efforts to rescue the living victims as well as digging the dead bodies from being buried under the collapsed blocks.

How about Myanmar? The cyclone hit far before the quakes shook China, but until now, when I open BBC websites, there are still articles that advocate the suffering of the Burmese who have no shelter and food. The notorious military junta (at least to the Western world) was as silent as the cyclone itself which came unpredictedly. Their anticipation is very slow. They have strong and organized army like the Chinese, but they don't use the army efficiently. But what bothers me at most is when the government rejected to allow the foreign aids to come to the damaged locations and distribute the help that has been financed from all over the world. They opened the blockade just now but it is very late. Many unlucky Burmese who should be able to survive have been dying already.

I think that the most important thing is the government' reactions and anticipations towards the disasters. Even in the Internet world we are living now, natural disasters are still hard to predict as they come naturally. They are the forces that shape the world we are living on, so we must accept them as one of the earth's geographical features. However, it's important to work as hard as possible to save the dying souls that have been unluckily hit by the disasters. For the sake of humanity, we cannot just let them suffering and dying in misery. I don't want to say that foreign aids are useless, but they don't bring positive impacts as long as the government itself does nothing or even closes the door for the aids to come.

I also want to highlight the reaction of the Western worlds towards the two governments. Obviously, the Western countries are now resilient when they see that the Chinese army are persevering to save the victims, not shooting the Tibetans. There are less critiques and complaints of humanity to the Chinese government now. Still, the Western media are somehow reluctant to appreciate widely the Chinese efforts. What an ego!

Otherwise, they turn their attention to the Burma's military junta. The Western reporters wrote abundant of articles criticising the poor steps that are taken by the government and the biased policies towards the foreign aids.

Lastly, some days ago, the Chinese government declared the mourning period to remember the tragic earthquake. Today, the Myanmar government, seemingly unwilling to be blamed anymore, did just the same thing. Whereas everyone who follows the news lately should know that Sichuan earthquake happens 9 days after Cyclone Nargis disspiated....

Vicious Voting

2008-05-16T06:33:00.006-06:00

Last night, when I was thinking of the democracy system, I suddenly found a very frightening law in the voting system, which is the vital part to establish representative government.

Let's set up a scenario like this. Long time ago, there was a kingdom. The royals and the king's family all lived in luxury, while the people starved to their death and intimidated and discriminated. At last, the poor people lost their patient. Recruiting the army, the middle class and provoked by the intellectuals, the people revolted and overthrew the atrocious king from his throne. The royals and upper class people were all executed for their crime on humanity. A new 'democratic' government was set-up by the middle class. The new Republic swore to meet all people's need using the democracy system which had been issued by the intellectuals.

Most of the poor people were uneducated and tempted to be able to decide the right things for themselves, so they impatiently complained and advised. For everyone had been given rights of expressions at this moment, the government had to, probably reluctantly, give their ears to their words. Chaos followed because the new representatives of the people didn't know what to do and how to govern for they had no experiences during the old regime. Dangers also came from outside as the neighbor countries saw the chance to take over the country. Then, the government came with the decision: voting system.

Voting means that the majority will always win, regardless the sanity and logic of the solution chosen. Even if the majority is 50.00001% and the minority is 49.99999%, the majority will win. The inexperienced government thought that this system was the best choice to end the chaos. They needed stability and order to rule the country properly.

The chaos still continued. Some group of unsatisfied peasants threatened the new republic by another revolution. There was also a group of rich aristocrats who prepared to restore the monarchy.

How? Democracy seemed to meet a dead end until a representative of government suggested.....

"Let us continue the voting system. Who doesn't agree with the chosen decision shall be executed, so there will be stability."

Somehow, for the suggestion seemed to be rational though radical, the decision was applied into a new law. In other words, the majority agreed to that solution. Hence, the minority was executed because they didn't agree, though the minority was almost half of the population of the country.

And so it went on. This system continued without judging that everyone is different and nobody will have share the same thought on everything. The bloody execution abounded and went on rapidly until there was only one man left in the country.

I realize that this scenario is hardly possible in the reality though it is still possible. However, it still exposes the fatal flaw of voting system. Sometimes, the majority's decision is not always the best. We must judge who those people who we call majority are. Are they experienced, educated, and enough socialized in politics? Are they experts in the area that they decide on? Do they experience by themselves the problems that are issued?

I suggest that discussion might be better for even the solutions that are suggested by the minority will still be mixed together with the majority's decision. This will result in the wiser policies that concern various groups of people's needs.

I-IV-V-IIIM-VIm-II(M/m)-IV/V-V(7)

2008-05-12T06:56:00.003-06:00

I want to sum up all the song that has this chord sequences:
I-IV-V-IIIM-VIm-II(M/m)-IV/V-V(7)

Here is an easy example. If the song's root chord is C major, the song's chorus will have this sequence of chords:

C - F - G - E (or E7) - Am - Dm (or D7) - F (or Gsus) - G (or G7)

Or any kind of progressive chords, as long as the bass progression sticks to that sequences.

I figure out that there are so many pop songs that adopt this sequence. I can say that this sequence is simple but nice to hear. There is a strickening harmony behind the simple progression, especially if the song is about about love or affection.

Some songs that I know that has this sequence:

1. Nothing's Gonna Change My Love for You (George Benson) in C#
2. Hard to Say I'm Sorry (Chicago) in E
3. In Love with You (Jacky Cheung) in Eb, F#, A and C.
4. Anata Ga Ita Mori (Jyukai) in E

I forget the other songs. But if you know more songs that have similar sequences, please let me know!

Injury Time 1.2

2008-05-12T04:33:00.001-06:00

I always wonder how it would be like if I have the ability to think like I blink my eyes. Would I understand concepts more easily? Or would I be more creative and articulate in expressing my own opinions? Or would I be more analytic and precise?

That is the secret of human mind which neurologists try to discover. However, it may not be impossible. I've just read a Horrible Science book from HML and it tells about a type of very rare disease (I forget the name) which can make the sufferer unable to forget. Sudden inspiration came to me as I tried hard to imagine scuh condition. I could simply skim thousands of textbooks pages then in an aeon I could memorize all. It would beenfit me to do some exams. Nonetheless, what would I think when I could forget nothing? Maybe I would also be a madman. I couldn't forget my own mistakes. I couldn't stop regretting about things that have passed so long ago. I would also always remember the mistakes that my friends have done. I couldn't forget my dreadful dreams. Then, what is the benefit?

Odd or not, the best way to live this life for me is to be an ordinary human. It doesn't mean that I'm lack of ambitions and intentions to improve myself. However, to overcome the human flaws is to become non-human, which will contradict your existence as a human. I have to be surprised do many times to read articles that say that the great people such as Einstein, Newton, Van Gogh, Beethoven etc. had mental illness, from bipolar disorder to OCD. Strangely, the unstability of their mental condition caused them to think out of the box and break the old concepts with their new, original concepts.

It's hard to believe that Einstein is mentally unsound like many people depict with his photograph that exhibit his tongue. Those psychologists must have their own definition of being mentally 'normal'. Are those great people assessed as ill because of their super abilities? Those great people may have exceeded the boundary of 'normality' and become 'overmen' (using Nietzsche's terms). To be beyond normal is to be abnormal, maybe.

Well, let's go away from my personal opinion. I have a lot of things to do for the next 2 weeks and it involves tons of school projects that eat my time until I have little time to read all the book that I've borrowed (and planned to borrow) from HML. Besides, I have been doing jobs for HML as my punishment for using a computer without booking first. Well, the job turns to be interesting to me. I felt jubilant when I arranged and tidied books in each HML's bookshelves. Strange? Not for me, personally. I felt that I was mending and conceptualizing many things while I was placing those books in order. Moreover, I can read newspaper more thoroughly when I'm not working, so I can analyze the current events more patiently. I'm looking for being a librarian now.

I also miss those CCT days. I really feel that I was more focused and determined to study when there are things ahead. Those lessons still reveberate in my mind right now. They tickle my curiosity to explore more about the topics, especially the Biology and Physics, by reading more resources. Well, from those CCT results, I learn the most fatal weakness that I have. Ignorance!! I keep making small mistakes in my calculation and losing marks because of this. And those small mistakes occur in every number of the CCT that demands careful calculations!

What makes it odder is the fact that I barely make small mistakes at all when I'm working normal assignements or excercises in the class. It seems like something interferes my mind to work well and precise when I'm doing important tests such as CCTs. It haunts and bothers me. I'm really seeking for the solutions right now. It's definitely not okay if you have prepared well then you receive rather disappointing results not because you're liable, but because your ability suddenly drops far when you're doing the tests.

I reckon that scoring well is about answering the questions besides ther readiness and the skills that you have acquired. If you don't answer correctly, than no matter how professional you're in that area, you have the chance to slip down to the chaos.

Altruism is Against Human Nature. Really?

2008-05-12T00:02:00.008-06:00

I was given an article about the nature of altruism in human beings by my Form Teacher last week. The article's title is 'the Evolution of Goodness' and the author is Dr. Lee Alan Dugatkin. It uses a lot of Darwinism social theories; the most obvious one is Natural Selection. The article discussed about how can such human behavior like altruism, the willingness to do good for the others without any special benefits

Darwin's theory of Evolution really puzzles me because, for me personally, it deteriorates the uniqueness of being human. It also distorts the meaning of being moral. In the past, people used to question why there is 'bad'. Now, to fulfill the unquestionable authority of Natural Selection in the modern science, intellectuals question why there is 'good' in human.

The attitude of being good the other people is one thing that differentiates human beings from animals. It is not the same with the altruism in animals which largely depends on the survival of the community, thus the individual. Man also has the same point in doing altruism, to improve his society. However, man can also work together with the other living creatures of different species and put affection towards them. We can see now there are many environmental organizations whose members dedicate their life to preserve creatures that are almost extinct, even tough the creatures are dangerous such as alligators or don't produce food for human such as rhinoceros. It will be ridiculous if all those naturalists are adamant to protect the endangered species only to be exhibited in the zoo. Those people can try artificial preservation for that. And of course, those people's egoism nature, or whatever they mostly believe in their Darwinism social theories, will not let them spending useful money which is useful to their own survival. I think that besides symbiosis, no other creature but human can sacrifice their life for the survival of the other species whose gene isn't the same. Natural Selection tries to make human a high-level animal; yet, it fails to explain why human has such a passionate desire to conserve other species which are realtively lower and sometimes has no specific purpose in human survival.

Scientists, like in that article, compare the human nature of altruism to bee's behaviors. Some bees are willing to sacrifice their lives to protect the queen thus ensure that their gene survives and is inherited. There are also many heroic stories of human beings, from comical superheroes to ordinary people such as fireman. I think that if they are questionied of what is their mere intention, it will be humanity (or at least salary). None of them will automatically think about the survival of their genes. Furthermore, altruism nature will contradict Natural Selection as man tend to preserve the 'inferiors' (according to the theories) which includes the disabled ones whose genes are not going to be useful if inherited.

To think about this, we have to find our own opinion about true human nature. Are men naturally evil or good? You are free to adopt Hobbes' Leviathan or Locke's social contract, but history has proved, that most people adore good values, which include altruism. I cannot say that the meaning of good for our ancestors is exactly the same with our values now. But we can see from all the civilizations in the world that there will always be heroic stories everywhere, whether the heroes are fighting the dragons or the cruel rulers. From this pattern, we can see there is a strong element inside human which pushes human to do altruism. Human is usually naturally interested and admiring the values of helping others, sometimes weaker and considered 'useless'.

To imagine what the nature of human behaviors will most probably be, I think it's useful to recognize what the human has done while other creatures don't. Human can build civilization, organize themseleves to improve theirlives due to their high intelligence. They also have other basic needs besides basic physical survival: cultural expression. Though human beings have high intelliegence, they will not likely create systematic languages like we are using now except that the human beings really need it. Whereas if we look at the animal examples, they don't need much language to eat and live long. They just communicate with body signals. From the invention of language alone, we can see that man has special need to communicate with each other. The need of communication has broken out the limitation of the need to survive; it's the unique aspect of human beings to share with each other. This is the proof that man is a social creature. And one of the product of the social needs is altruism.

The theory of Natural Selection is actually very vague; Darwin himself said that Natural selection is to preserve what is good and to eradicate what is bad. I don't attempt to redefine what is 'good' or what is 'bad' because of those words' relative interpretations. The problem is every human being has his own potential, regardless the physical situation he is into. Natural selection only considers about physical features that are coded by the 'selfish' genes (as Richard Dawkins said). It doesn't concern the human emotional and intellectual ability. Since the theory is made by human intelligence, it's improbable for the theory to judge the level of human intelligence. Let me give you an example.Let's say that a 'bad' intelligence is to create irrational theories. Theories will be irrational if it is not valid and/or not supported by factual evidences. Natural Selection is meant to be universal theory, so if there is only one evidence that can break the prediction made by the theory, the theory will break down as its induction proves to be wrong. Then the theory becomes a myth and irrational so it will be automatically assessed by itself as 'bad'. I have shown you some examples in which Natural Selection doesn't seem to apply. How can a theory contradict each other?

In conclusion, I think that Natural Selection is very inappropriate to explain the truth of human nature. Firstly, it is very inappropriate to conclude human behaviors by observing the animals or even plants. Animals don't have the human behavior to conserve other species which are 'inferior' in the nature. Then, is it advisable to do experiments on human? You have to concern about moral laws and long-term impacts about that. Maybe, you really want to test yourself by pondering on it, find out whether your curiosity or your conscience wins. If you are a human and human does have the same behavior nature like the animals', you won't even waste your time to think about the truth of your experiments. Isn't it enough to be your subjective proof? Hence, if Natural Selection falls down, then altruism can re-take its place as one of the original and unique human behavior, no longer going against the nature laws. Thus, you may understand that I disagree with the author's of the 'Evolution of Goodness' opinion.

I think it is really a waste of time to think why there is 'good' or 'bad' in the human nature due to the vague interpretations of those words which are subjective, since we are the thinking thing and we do the interpretation while we are also free from assumptions. Why don't we try to erase the 'bad' and persevere to implement the 'good'?

It remembers me of OBS' motto:

To strive, to serve, and not to yell.

Philosophy

2008-05-11T06:51:00.004-06:00

I always have a big question in my mind: what makes human different from other creatures? Human beings have consicence, but they can be harsher than animals. Human beings have far better capabilities to exploit the nature, but they are also very stupid because they are using their technology to destroy the only planet they can live in until now.

What causes human to have intention? I don't believe that all the wills that we have are based merely on the basic animal instinct which is to survive. Men don't live to survive; they live to live, not only keep their heart beating as long as they can. And men don't just mate with their partners; they fall in love, there are break-ups and tragic romantic stories. Men don't just kill each other to survive and to conquer; they work together to improve their livings.

Is it the ego that the Buddha said? Buddha Gautama taught mankind that to live is to suffer as long as we have this abstract thing called ego. Ego will create desires, which are bad for our soul. We have to work hard and meditate to erase our ego. That is the only way to reach Nirvana, which I intrepet as the best mental state that a man can have in this materialistic world.

Shall I stick to Christianity? Jesus had the most wonderful explanation of the world that I have ever known. Jesus taught that there is God, our Father in Heaven, who are willing to do anything four our salvation so we are assured a place in His Kingdom after our death. His Kingdom will last forever. Christianity, for me personally, is the most beautiful religion of all. It teaches us to love thy enemy, forgive those who have wronged us, and so on. Nothing in this world can challenge its Golden Rule. It is the best form of Humanity. It is the most idealistic one and sometimes, the most unrealistic one too.

I also see that Islam and Jews are very similar to Christianity, so I also put them into the same category, the deistic and humanitarian beliefs. Sadly, many of those religions' followers have used those beautfiul teachings to create wars and bloodshed. Not all of them, but it is so pitiful to see many trouble makers and murderers use God and His religions as their shield to cover their crimes.

Or is it the Will to Power as Schopenhauer and Nietzsche describe? Or is it Freud's Odypeus Complex, Jung's inferiority syndrome, or Sartre's nihilism? Do we have free will? Are we a brain in a vat? What does it mean to be conscious and to be dreaming? Is it useful to do science because this world is not eternal?

I will try to express my opinions in my ability to answer one of the life questions. As a person who believe in Moral Laws and exact purpose of life. Maybe my answer will lead to more questions that will trap myself in the dungeon of philosophy. Who knows....

Origin of Rascism

2008-05-08T05:52:00.005-06:00

Rascism is the shadow of every civilization that contains the mixtures of various different so-called races. This mindset has been cursed heavily and at other side, worshipped badly. Rascism is the main key of the decline ofa great civilization. Rascism is actually a type of the 'ruler-ruled' system that has been the main idea of human civilization. But rascism leads to discrimination, humiliation, and at its worst rate, genocide.

What makes rascism so unique? It's very simple. Rascism is to judge someone based only on their skin colour. It is like you decide you decide whether a food is delicious or not only from its display. You don't care even the food is poisoned or contaminated, but you keep on your ideals that your eyes are the best judge. Well, people can have different way to choose food only after they are told about the potential harm to their health. However, if you trace the history of the world, human beings are usually adamant to wipe their rascist ideals. They know that irrational hatred towards someone that they probably never know is bad. It only causes the spirit to destroy to rise and cover their future. Nevertheless, they are still unwilling to change their mind. What happens with rascism?

Luckily, rascism has been seemingly eradicated from the modern world. As democracy is promoted through all the world by the power of Western, many more nations in the once colonialized continents lift up their head and dare to look at the Western's piercing eyes. They establish their own nation-states and build sovereign governments which are respected by the world.

The problem is most of the nation-state boundaries that abound right now were created by the Western colonializers. Those imperialists never asked the natives about the original boundaries and just marked the demarcation based on their resources hunger and protection against other tribes and more importantly, other imperialist powers. This simple lax territorial system confuses and causes conflicts now indirectly.

The imperialist didn't stop at the demarcation. They also migrated some natives to other continents then set up those natives' settlements there so they could serve their European masters as slaves, of course. What the Europeans colonialist mostly never thought about is the fact that they are heavily outnumbered by those 'coloured' races. They never calculated that sometime in the future their slaves would arise gradually but surely to resist imperialism as those races became more educated. Ironically, the Europeans had to give them education so they could work in the factories, which are the main machine of the capitalist imperialism.

The history fact proves this. Northern and Western African natives were brought by the British to America. Those Africans were laboured as slaves until the Civil War in 19th century. However, the sentiment didn't stop at that point. The European descendants in American had recruted those Africans as labours for centuries that they couldn't just agree to accept that both of them are equal just because of an idealist president. The cold war continued and culminated int he 1960s during the Civil Rights Movements. A number of activists, black and whites, from Baptist minister Martin Luther King Jr. to extremist Malcolm X remonstrated for the equality. After years of pressure and support, rascism gradually diminishes from America. The so-called blacks can now enter the government. One of them reigns as the incumbent Foreign Affair Minister and one of them are struggling for presidency election.

I don't want to talk about the equality of the races here. What catches my attention is how can some civilizations erase rascism from their land. I observe that rascism is a very complicated problem until nobody knows exactly now what causes it. It has been like a strong dogma taught to many people. Mostly the people adopt rascism like they adopt religious faith; in other words, they take it purely for their emotional ego needs and not for logical reasoning. Therefore, some so-called scientists and experts try to find the rationale theories of rascism. For me, it's like Aristotle concluded that woman is born because of errors during fertilization just because Aristotle himself was not a woman. More hillariously, even failed painter like Adolf Hitler could compose briliant lies of rascism into a powerful ideology that destroyed great nations in his era. This shows how powerful rascism is on men.

Thus, I think that it will be useful if we find what ends rascism as the clue to the source of rascism itself. In many countries, I see there are similarities. It happens when the nation has unifromed language, is democratic (dictatorial also will do but the stability will only occur on the skulls of the victimized people), and has most their people educated. USA, for example, applied the policy to mix the whites and the blacks' school into one school from the 1950s. When segregation is abolished, the impact is very certain for the future. The today ruling generations were once the children of the 1950s who went to the same school together. Education plays largely here. Those black and whites become friend and they no longer see the difference in their skin colours. They see through their characters, as what Martin Luther King once hoped. I cannot say that the equality in America has been perfect, that USA is indeed a very good example to follow. The friendship that is built from very young ages grow into the harmony.

Let us see another example in Asia, Singapore. When established as a trade port in the beginning of 19th century, there were only one majority race, the Malays. As the colony became richer, thanks to the opening of the ports in China after the cruel Opium Wars, more Europeans migrated to settle and rule in this small island. Profits came and Singapore developed quickly. The natives, the Malays, became the ruled. However, the British somehow thought the number of labourers were not enough, so they brought the Indians, mostly the Tamils in the Southern part of India, to work there. Indians had advantages for their number were big and they could easily be hired by the British. Besides the British's policy, other races flooded this small island. The Chinese, hoping to find better walfare after the sad Opium Wars in which their hatred royalty were shaken by the Western ships, migrated to trade. They soon became the majority of the Singapore society.

The British colonialist amended a system in which each race stayed in the distinct locations around the island based on their speciality and the potential profit that would come to the colonialist. The mixed eduaction was just a dream and each race stayed within their own community, spoke in their own local language and never got to know other races. Luckily, the British set up a mixed education system to the people as the industry grew rapidly. Those races were standarized in one language, English. Some of them studies abroad to Europe then became the main leaders of the nation when the Malay colonies became independent. These educated people who could speak in English thus could communicate with the rest of the world set up a civilization system which regards equality. Although there were many problems and sometimes bloodsheds, Singapore succesfully transitioned into a first world country. Racial harmony are guaranteed.

From those two examples, we can see that education plays very important part. Then, I can say that rascism is not natural; it is nurtured. I highly disapproved the views that assume that rascism is born, because that will be the same with the notion that some people are more equal than the others; in other words, some races are inferior to some particular other races. As i trace back the human history, I see that rascism of Europeans didn't start when colonialisation began. It had existed as far as Ancient Greece. Alexander the Great assumed that other civilizations beside the Greeks are barbarians. While Alexander had honourable ideas to join the different races in the world has he attempted to conquer the world, many Europeans though that other races were inferior to them. Therefore, rascism has existed even before the era of industry or revoultion of science. Then it must have started from the very early period of human history.

I hypothesize that the origin of rascism can be traced from basic human psychology. I adopt Maslow's theory of hierarchy of human needs for this hypothesis. I start with a newborn child. You can see that a newborn child is like an open-book, ready to be written and shaped. You can see that a newborn child mostly cries all the time while a more mature human being doesn't cry as much as the babies do. The babies are already human beings. They have their physical and emotional needs, but they don't know how to fullfill their needs. The closest people of a newborn baby are usually his parents or his close relatives. According to the genetic law, the child should inherit the genetic traits of his parents/relatives. Certainly the child's parents will have the similar skin colour as the child has.

The parents will be the first in the child's life to feed him, help him to sleep and amuse him. As this habit becomes routinity, the child develops a feeling of trust upon his parents. Assuming that his parents are the reliable source of his physical and emotional satisfaction, the child grades the parents as his allies, not enemies. The child, who still has limited thinking ability, will take his parents' physical appearance as the sign do the child can recognize who is trusworthy and who is not. And skin colour dominates the child's immature generalization because the skin colours dominate the parents' physical appearance.

As the child grows bigger, the child begins to receive tuition from his parents. This is the most crucial period of the child's views towards the other races. If the parents educate them to mix with other races and befriend them, rascism will most likely not grow. However, if the child stays only with the group of people that areof his race, he will never get to know the other races. The childish xenophobia and signature thinking will stay with them unconciously. So, when the child grows bigger and enters the society which contains different races, he will be reluctant to gather with other races because of their mindset. The one which impacts is the feeling of safety. Because the child has assesed which skin colour or facial charateristic can satisfy his physical and emotional needs, the child will automatically see at the other races with a feeling of fear. Fear that those other races will do harm on them. The child will see the other races as the 'other'. The other races are not same as himself, the child will think, because the other races never give me experience of physical and/or emotional satisfaction in the past. Thus how can they guarantee safety thus share a common identity with the child?

This is where nurture comes in. If the parents are rascist or skin-colour selective, the child's infant xenophobia will increase and become a fixed mindset. When the mindset is formed into a belief, which is basically an assurance of safety, and the mindset is adopted by a group of people, it becomes rascism. In the past, about thousand years ago, the different human races were seperated by geographical condition thus it made them highly improbable to meet each other and get together. The mindset is inherited through many generations until our generation now. However, nowadays rascism exist as the form of a political system, a mere ideology. But the basic is still the same, the instinct of safety that will ensure the individual's survival.

I think it is not logical to think that rascism must be true because of the natural selection due to human survival. To survive, human cannot live alone. Human is such an unique creature that he tends to socialize and express his emotional desire in the society that he creates. that is why human develops complicated system called language and civilization while other species don't. From that notion, human can only survive if there are other human begins, or at least, he has the impression that there are other human beings beside them. If the people of different races work together, it will be great for the society's advancement for there will be more ideas and perspectives to be used for the development. You can see from direct examples from the history and world today. The problem is how the relations among the different races are like. Is the raltion a ruler-ruled type like the slavery and racial discrimination in the USA in the past? Or is it a cooperation based on harmony and proper education like in the modern democratic nations? I think the second one is better, because there will be a stability. There will be more instances to do check-and balance if there are more people participating in the society's institutions and those people are given equal chance, which means all the races must participate.

From the genetic perspective, I think it is very odd to say that rascism is natural and right. The difference between a race and another race is only about 0.0000007% of human DNA. The biology also theorizes that the more variations, the better the community is because there will be more thoughts to work on the community's survival. Races are the type of variations of huamn beings. All races are the same species, Homo Sapiens. If all the varations of Homo Sapiens work together, the survival of the species will be more assured. From this point, I can conclude that even rascism is against the Darwinism sociology, which is heavily adopted by the modern people. And Hitler insisted in Mein Kampf that rascism is even in the Bible. What a pity!

From those points, we can summarize the basic origin of rascism. Rascism is like xenophobia, but it is more a structured system of mindset on the relations in a particular society. Rascism is a psychological phenomenon of human instinct, more accurately emotional. Rascism is not rational nor it is suitable to the science. Rascism is nurtured, not natural. Rascism can be eradicated from this earth if we all what causes it.

I hope my hypothesis is quite okay for you, since I think there are still many aspects that I haven't explored. If you have any more suggestions about this topic, please tell me. I really believe that to end rascism we must know the source of it, so I would love to know more.

I remember what inspires me to write this essay. It is a quotation from a movie called 'Mississipi Burning'. It goes like this:

They said it was all in the Bible.
But now I know, that hatred is not something you're born with.
You learn it. You accept it. You apply it.
And then you marry it.....

Love Songs in Popular Music

2008-05-07T06:16:00.004-06:00

Love is the strongest and most commercial theme that the popular music can use. You may try to count how may pop songs' titles use words such as 'love', 'lover', or even more artistic vocabulary like 'unintended'. Those songs all centralize on 'love'. But what love? Is it a true love, or, shall I say, just a hormonal phenomenal of a grown-up person (or growing-up like teenagers) that blurs mind to redefine lust as love?

I am not trying to define what love is. Thousands have attempted and none of them can be said as successful. It is a very subjective matter and really concerning of one's deepest and sometimes most hurtful experience. I just want to disscuss about the love that the popular culture has brought. As I read through the history of the world, there is never an era in the world history before the 1950s when love becomes so dominant among the teens. It looks like those kids just grow up too fast. They haven't attained any degree but they have already thought after a serious relationship. What is going on their mind?

I am sure that the popular culture that is wide spread nowadays shapes the mind of the teenagers to think that love is priority. Beautfiul and seemingly sensible sentences such as 'Love Conquers All', 'I Don't Want to Live Without You', and even 'You aer the Only One' intoxicate every mind everyday. It has been so common for us that we unconciously accept it as the truth.

Psychologically, teens are in the era when they are beginning to seperate from their parents but they just are not fully ready to step into the real world. They gradually see the drastic change that in the cruel society, they are not the center of attraction. When the kids are still in the hands of the parents, the parents often cultivate a false image that the kids are the sole emperors. Now, as they grow up and become more tangled with many new communities, they realize they new an identity. Some try to achieve it through academics, but ironically as time goes on, the standard has changed. It's not the character that really matters. Popular culture through the movies, magazines, novels, songs etc. emphasize the importance of relationship.

I am not saying that relationships between young men and women are not to be taken seriously. When you have been into something like that, you have been responsible of other's feeling. However, you must also remember the feelings of the other people who love you the most, who love you even before you are born. They are the family. You just cannot run way from them to seek for liberation with your future bride (or bridegroom).

Also, I think true love never involves sex. Sex is a feature of human's animalistic instinct to reproduce. I know that not everyone will agree, but personally I think that love and sex are seperated though they are not totally complementary. Love is when you care of someone else more than you care of yourself. This is one positive impact of love on the teenagers, who just grow up from the fantasiscal 'emperors' state to be an adult. Love encourages you to tolerate difference and admit that I am not the only one who is special in this world. It affects especially on boys, who are naturally self-centered. However, the romatic love, eros, which has been the popular definition for the word love now, is a mix of love and sex. As teenagers are trying to find identity, their physical aspects also step to maturity. If one has a lover, it is a proof for that person that he/she is also needed in the society, or in other words, the person exists so the other can exist. That is a wonderful paradigm. It motivates your life.

The worst thing of the romatic love is when you cannot differentiate between love and sex. I cannot say sex is wrong because it is needed for the survival of human species. I'm much worried about the wrong assumptions that current teenagers usually have. Through popular culture, love is mixed with sex. It is aggravated by the decline of morality now, which has made the physical maturity grows faster but mentality maturity grows slower. It creates a hedonistic lfiestyle that focuses on nothing but pleasure. If that happens to you, you have forgotten the meaning of love. You are as egoistic as animals thus your intelligence will be defeated by your instincts.

I can give you some examples from the popular love songs. Phrases such as 'holding hand', 'kiss your lips', 'hold you in my arms' and even 'make love' have become so common. It has destroyed the definition of love. Love has lost its purity. Whay can't you say it is lust? Why can't everybody be frank enough to admit whether it is affection or instinct?

It is very tough because there are no clear boundaries. What drives romantic love is usually sexual instinct, especially such love that is called 'love at the first sight'. Try to think it rationally. How can you love a person if you never know the person before? You may never know about the person's name! This involves a lot about chemistry of love, which tries to redefine love as a chemical reaction in order to improve our genetic condition. It is the issue of selfish gene, which is too long to be written here.

However, if you find that person is nice, amiable, amicable, and both of you became a very good friend, that is when love comes in. Love is a state when there is another ego that you worship beside yourself. Love is where you are willing to give without thinking the what you will get. You cannot say it is irrationale. Your logical, reasoning power is an effect of superstition believe. For example, the most basic and rationale logic is mathematic. 1 + 1 = 2 happens when you believe so. The pbjectivity depends on how many will agree the same thing and how it makes senses with the outer world. When you believe, you are worshiping what you are believing in. You are actually admiring the belief as higher than you because the belief is something that is taught and accepted by you, not created by yourself. In love, you worship somebody as the other ego of yourself. You create an imaginary, or say methaphysical picture, that this person is the complementary of your finity state.

That abstract idea of love makes it very vulnerable to be contaminated by other desires, such as sex. And that what exactly happens now. Well, to be realistic, I realize that love si not possible to exist in this physical world without physical desires, which include sex. However, as everything starts from your mindset, it will become your habit and shape your life. I am bored to listen to love songs' lyrics which offer physical instincts that bias the real meaning of love. The concept of love that is taught by Jesus, Buddha, Muhammad, and many others become 'out-of-date'. Thanks to the excess of technology and information's connectivity, now everyone live in two worlds. The real world and the virtual world which is simulated by the media. This virtual world becomes your sixth sense of the real world and also affects your life largely. The more you are indulged in it, the more you accept it as the highest authority. Because most of the aspect of the virtual world is entertainment, which worships pleasure of self, you become worshipper of only yourself. To make it softer, the media offers love as an entertainment. This is not right in the real context. Love is not an entertainment or 'just an easy game to play' like it is sung by the Beatles, but a resposibility.

I'm just worried to see that music that should be the positive expression of human feeling has become the commodity of the evil virtual world. And one of the commodity is love which has been redefined and reprocessed. How can they make love into something that produces money? Those love songs say 'hearts' but actually their hearts are in their wallets!

I don't intend to insult those song composers who compose really for artistic desire. I am sorry if I am hurting your feeling. However, I suggest to all musicians in the world to compose songs that are not about eros love. Write something about poverty, inequality, or even the grace of life. Or you can even write songs about the school's subjects. If a 5-year old kid can know the definition of love through artistic products such as songs, then why can't he do the same thing with general knowledges? It is the matter of human's future. I never hope the following generations to be hedonistic and completely lured into the wrong definitions of everything until they find nothing to serve them anymore on the Earth.

Well, I admire the artistic side of love songs. I can say that many love songs that I know are the best songs that I have heard. Maybe because it's about love (and the money that can come from it), the songs are created more meticulously with full desire and maximum creativity. The results? Some of the sweetest tunes that the world has ever heard?

Maybe if a song is not about commercial love, it's not a pop music anymore. Okay, then let's just enjoy what's there to excite our artistic desire. Just don't forget to have your own dignity. Sometimes, the best ways are not the most comfortable ways for us. Don't be lured into the wrong concepts. Always think and confront the popular concepts. You don't have to be a bohemian thus exiled from the outside world. Just don't follow the flow very easy!!

Music Review - Introduction

2008-05-07T06:12:00.001-06:00

To express my love of music, I will try to write on something about music frequently in this blog. Probably, I will make a review of a song that I am listening heavily the respective week or day. I will also attempt to post the chords, the bass, and the lyrics of the song

All my peers around me are pop music-addicted, so I have been also influenced by pop music these months, especially Japanese ones. I learn some Japanese words, though I am usually not a quick learner of a new foreign language. I do not know how to review other exclusive genres, such as jazz and classic. Both of them are too classy for an autodidact like me!

Damsel in Distress...... and Dungeon....

2008-04-29T05:54:00.006-06:00

Shocking news can happen every day. Yet, not all shocking news are equal. Some are more equal that it causes sensation all over the world.

This morning, when I read The Strait Times, I gaped and was inevitably stunned. Captivated by the eye-catching title of an article, 'Monster Dad', I decided to read and scrutinize. Well, I can realize whether an article is gorgeous or not but I can never wonder how big.

Shortly, the news is about a father who locked his daughter and later, her children inside the basement of his house for 24 years. The secret was broken when one of the children fell unconcious that he had to be taken to hospital. The chain reaction followed and the cover was blown up. But what truly amazed me is the indecent intelligence of the monstrous dad, Josef Fritzl, to keep the disguise for so long until even his wife and other children had never any ideas about this.

Trained as an electric engineer, Mr. Fritzl planned the basement meticulously and almost flawlessly. The basement, thought it is very narrow and small, provides proper facillities where normal human being can live. Besides that, Fritzl arranged a awesome security system so there would be only him who could access the secret passage. I am also very amazed on how he could keep three illegitimate children, all fathered by him, in that mental-torturing dungeon. The children even hadn't seen sunlight before they were released by the police.

What I want to guess here is the current mental state of Elizabeth Fritzl, the poor daughter, along with her children. What would it feel if you are captured for 24 years? You have no chance to talk to your friends. You will surely lose the touch of the modern world. You will be dejected for you have only limited social space. And the one who keeps you inside is the person that you hate very much.

Is it really like this? How can that person survive then? Look at the 'normal' news. People all around the world march and sing for freedom. they will protest and remonstrate even if they have to change their all-vehicle habit to all-walking habit. Look at the busy people's behaviours. They can get irritated so easily even if we only touch them when they are under pressure. I ponder, does human's mental survival ability have any limits when there are no obivous hopes?

The general opinion is when there's a will, there's a way. However , we see from this 'kidnapping' case that Elisabeth can survive for 24 years. I think that she's well aware of hte small probabiliy of her getting out of the artificial jail. I begin to think of another possibility.

Maybe, a man is born with almost unlimited will to survive. However, when the man is educated with several mindsets brought by the society's system, man begins to forget his natural ability and thus unconciously obeys the subtle system. Like pressure in work or school, for example. A particular target is set for the person and that target must be fullfilled so the person can gradually earn status and position in society, which basically is needed to survive. When there is no obvious target, when there is nothing to lose, will you lose your will to live? Or you just want to live without thinking what is the real purpose?

I imagine that Elisabeth had tried once or many times to commit suicide, but malicious Josef might have anticipated this step before. Elisabeth would lose her sense of real life for so mone years in captivation. Then she might begin to live in her fantasy. What kind of escape did she have?

I also want to observe the children. They never experience and know the real world. I figure that their mindset wiould be limited to the extent of that basement's wall. What kind of entertainment did they have? Surely, Josef wouldn't give a thing about the children's development. Elisabeth must be the central figure who acts as a mother, a teacher, and a saviour. Did Elisabeth secretly tell them a hope that there would be a free world, where the sun is bright, then air is free? The children have almost reached puberty. Will they ever be accepted in society? What are their thinking-levels now?

My memory rolls back to Natascha Kampusch. She is a very good example to study. She was captured for 8 years before she was released. Though the period is shorter, she also suffers from torture and unstoppable will to be free. From Natascha's case, I can inductively assume what happened to Elisabeth and her chilldren. Natascha was intelligent and seemed to be educated normally, thanks to her capturer's willingness to supply her with newspapers and radio. Natascha also developed an inexplicable sympathy towards her ex-capturer, no matter how much violences she had received from him in the past.

Maybe Elisabeth and the children has also developed the same sympathy. Maybe Fritzl had managed to educate them and become the ambassador of the outside world for them.

It's so ironic that this thing is driven only by simple lust. When Elisabeth has grown up and became 42, maybe the-also-ageing Josef will try to find new 'concubine'. It seems that he has stopped, but once the sin was made, it can't be rejected. He needs to keep his reputation, but at the end of the day loses it all.

Just a dangerous gambit. But a quite successful one.

Maybe people will curse Josef as a devil now. He probably has lost his conscience.

That's right. He has lost his conscience over a simple thing. He cannot dodge to be unsatisfied. He has created many ordeals and troubles which are actually not needed for his survival. Nonetheless, the pressure of keeping the secret has pushed him away from the boundary of normality. He has made a wicked but witty invention.

It also means that he once had a hope that this secret would be forever, or at least, until he lay inside his grave. Has he ever thought what will happen if he suddenly dies? He's already 73.

That's the power of will. You forget the real world, you create the new boundaries, and you blow it over. It's just your purpose that differentiates what the will's product will be, a crime or a celebration of mankind.

It's like an old saying:

"Kill one, you become a murderer.
Kill thousands, you become a king."

Infinite People, Zero Food

2008-03-30T06:28:00.002-06:00

One day in the very near future (nearer than you think!) you are queuing in a very long line of people longing for just a plate of chicken soup. You figure out that there are infinte poeple in front of and behind you (of course, you must concern the limits of your eyesight). With stomach creaking and squeaking all the time, you surely want to cheat by leaving the astronomical queue and trudging heavily to the stall (you haven't had anything munched by your belly for weeks, how can you run?). After stamping for about 500 meters, you found this sign attached in the front of the stall: "OUT OF SUPPLY. PLEASE CHECK THE NEXT STALL FROM HERE. IT'S ABOUT 3 KM AWAY."

If you don't drop dead after reading that dreadful announcement, I really have to extol your superb ability to survive. From that illustration, you should reckon the very basic competition amid Homo Sapiens (or, in English, men), and among all the species in the world, food. Maybe you have enough money to by every food that you need. You have a fridge in your kitchen filled with all your family's needs. How if there's no more food supply in the world? Money can't buy, cause money won't be able to produce food; it's only something to exchange. Unless you're willing to devour your money, you will probably move to the next solution: produce your food by your self.

You will need one of the most crucial but largely forgotten and ignored vocation, farming. Get your hoe and sickle and be ready for a fascinating but woeful experience: leaked with muds and insects. However, how's there no land? Hydrophonic man!! Do you have the idea? Oh yeah, that's one of the stupid things they taught me in the school. Do you have the medium? Umm, I have to visit some plant store, perhaps. How about the seeds? From the mature plants, of course!! If there's no moer land for farming, it means no more plants cultivated, right? Oh, no!! How about cloning? Yes, that's going to be a brilliant solution, but it's not cheap at all!

That scenario is possible. However, do you really want to ponder all the day to find way the way how to clone plants and animals only to cook them as a one-day meal? You'll probably starve first and get your lazy brain frozen then. You also have to compete with the others to obtain the tools and books for cloning. Thanks to scientific advance, life's easier. Internet's everywhere. But, where's the mercy? Moreover, where's the food?

Ignoring the excruciating hunger brought by your brain and your gut, you suddenly get the inspiration to hunt. Hunt where? Zoo? Or the empty supermarkets? Or drainpipes (there are lots of rats and insects there)? Or maybe the streets (convert to cannibalism)?

Is this the world we are going to face? I think this is somehow inevitable. According to Thomas Malthus's essay, the population growth will be in geometrical form (1,2,4,8,16,etc) while the food-supply sprouts only in arithmatical form (1,2,3,4,5,etc). In the perfect world, the limited food will be distributed fairly. But, have you forgotten about the greed of the man? You can see the example of the unfair distribution of meals in the form of famines in Africa and other third world countries. However, that also indicates that the food-supply is acutally RUNNING OUT!!

You're a very fortunate person if you have chance to read this. That means you have sufficient amount of energy to think and ratiocinate about the wild population advance and, at the samte time, enviromental destruction. Those two indecent things, directly and indirectly, are boosted by the advancement of science. The Genetic Science successfully helps millions of babies to be born and freed from genetical disease which will limit their life spans, but at the same time, the population growth is getting higher and higher. About the environmental destruction.... I'm sure that everybody knows about that very well. You can listen to Mandela's speech, UN's speech, Blair's speech, and even Bush's speech (if you're really that curious and informative). You can just look at advertisements about global warming etc. It seems everyone's going to his/her own suicide. Also remember, poverty is the parent of crimes.

After all of these persuasions, do you realize the importance of preserving food? It's not about saving up so many Coca-Cola bottles inside your fridge for the days of famines ahead; it's not about you. It's about ALL of US!! You cannot live alone to see everyone falls down in the streets after finding no edible food to eat. Maybe you will wipe all your reluctantce about environmental saving and all that stuffs. Maybe you will bother yourself the next time you waste a plate of rice. Fortunately, our planet hasn't been to tired to carry miserable junks of people who can do nothing but throw food as junks into the trash cans. As an information, I'm not trying to threat you; I jst want to convey about something that's impending. Only us, the only human race left on this world (including those junks) that can impede this, or at least, delay for a while.

To end the previous story:

You keep going on to the next store which in fact is situated on Mars. You have some nice chats with the aliens down there. Say, that you're given food for free, even delicacies that you've been desiring for centuries. As the reward, those aliens demand your lethargic bones to be broken and shattered into smithereens to be processed further as their food. Of course, those deceptive aliens are incompatible with our food. What will you do next?

You may prefer swallowing all the dirts inside your empty fridge....

Virtue of the Vicious: Part II

2008-03-26T05:57:00.001-06:00

The sky poured an immense amount of water to the earth. It was a thunderstorming dusk. The weather prediction never mentioned it in the TV. Much to the people's surprise, the temperature illogically fell free to about 15 degree celcius. Tiny blocks of ices plummeted to add the hazy calamity. With the intensity of the wind and the rain, almost all the highways were closed.

I watched the horrible scenery from my house's rear window. The frightening sound of thunder shocked me and I reacted by moving to the next room. It was the guest room inside my family's small house. I put my hands on my back, wandered around and waited for a phone call. Anna and Brian hadn't returned and I began to worry. My fingers kept tapping on the cell phone and repeatedly pressed the 'Send' button. One minute, two minutes, they hadn't replied nor called. The storm increased its cruelty outside.

And suddenly, there was a blackout. Darkness was ubiquitous. Being able to see just the darkness, I mumbled and cursed the bloody weather. If my siblings had been here with me, my angst would have been mitigated. I couldn't wait longer. I took my jacket and hat and also the torch light.

I opened the front door with great effort. The wind was so vigorously strong. I could feel it presing my chest. I stormed outside and took a quick check on the electricity box. The switch indicated that the blackout was caused by the State Electricity Factory. Damn the SEF, I grumbled again. There ought to be a broken or short-circuited cable somewhere. And it would consume a long time to detect the source since all the cables were burried underneath, not like when the last time I experienced thunderstorm here.

I decided to go inside to find shelter. I locked the door to anticipate the wind blasting inside. Taking my time, I walked across the guest room and stare at the family photos. There was one which was very old. The photographic paper had decayed for ageing. There was the younger version of my mom and dad there, wearing their best clothes while tying the knot. Looking at such a picture like that would only recall my pain again.

There was a smaller picture next to it. I recognized the three cute children there: Anna, Brian and Toby. Toby, well it was truly Toby. I gradually regained my memory about Toby. Toby should be about my age now if he were still alive. He left too soon, too soon to see the beauty and agony of the world. Maybe, he had been rejoined again with his parents who always loved him more than me, I guessed. Whereever they were, I would likely to go there to.

What was beside that photo? A photo covered up with dust. I used my fingers to clean the tiny molecules. Eventually, the most heartbreaking picture showed. I nearly threw that scarry thing away, but luckily I managed to behave myself to be calm. I had promised in the front of my parents' tombs that from now on I had to be brave to face my own past. My unimaginable past which always haunted my conscience was no more than another rags-to-riches story, only with some miserable additional features. It was all about the need of approval.

It was a figure of a baby that resided that photograph. And I had to let my pain - another pain - to be renascent again. This innocent baby reminded me about the power of love - and the destruction that followed. It was not too wise to reminisce that sad tale again. With many ordeals that I experienced, I had enough reasons to hate my life. Nevertheless, this baby - this handsome little boy - taught me how to admire life. He was too unfortunate - or fortunate? - to escape this life in a very short period. I once wondered what he would become if he never knew the selfishness of a man like me. Or maybe if he was still here and he knew me, the situation would aggravate. This dilemma certainly made my heart dwindled. I never had more affection to bestow to him. Don't be worry, boy. If my time has come, I shall pay back everything you hace missed from this world. If only I could....

I took my mind out of my painful reflection. After all, life still goes on. I was still waiting for two more persons whom I loved. Had I turned to be so evil? I didn;t think so, because I still worried about their whereabouts.

The moment that I expected finally came. I heard the sound of a car's horn. I bolted to the garage which was next to the guest room. Anna and Brian were inside the car with another guy I never saw before. They stepped outside just after the car had been completely inside the dusty garage. I grabbed the garage door's knob and desperately tried to pull it. But I couldn't; maybe the door's knob was somehow frozen. I cursed again the bad temperature as the cause of my mishap.

Brian helped me to close the door with his strong and young arms. I could see his muscle working effectively to pull the troublesome door. After it was totally closed, the light couldn't go in, so I turned on the lamp. The garage soon turned to be half-bright with a weak neon lamp shining. It was time that I realized the electricity in the house had worked again.

"Bloody hell! That was a harsh storm," said Brian.

A thunder bolted loudly and blew everyone's heart.

"And becoming more frantic and frenetic," added him.

Everyone but the streanger walked to the guest room. Ann doffed her shabby jacket and Brian turned on the TV. The other person was still inside the garage.

"Please somebody call Jeffrey in!" said Ann.

Jeffrey, who was he? I was somehow familiar with that name. Without any further thought, I trudged back to the garage. The man was wandering around, dawdling time. He winced when he saw me approaching him.

"Who are you?" I coined the conversation.

"What did you just say? I'm Jeffrey," replied him in an unfriendly tone.

"Um... I don't really know that. Ann called you."

"Let her hone the bad knife first. I won't come unless I have the knife to cut the pork."

"OK, no need to argue, right," I tried to behave my temper.

"Who are you? I've seen you plenty times in those family photos."

"Do you live here?"

"I'm Ann's husband, at least the last I check. Answer my question."

I was a bit shocked. "Ann's married?" I murmured. I aborted his question and sly glance that scrutinized my whole body.

"Ah, you must be her dishonourable brother," he smiled a sinister smile.

I was offended to hear his last line. I nearly collected my greatest burden anger to knock his face. Well, it was dimmed there but still I could see his clumsy face. He looked like a twenty-years old mannerless young adult that I frequently saw in Pulantai. He had shorter stature than me. his hair, thick and black, emphasized the contrast to his fair, almost bleached, skin. His eyes were so narrow, with elipse face and swollen nose. Only his lips which were easily seen for it was wide and brightly red as if he used lipstick.

He kept gazing at me in a very arrogant way. He lifted up his head to skim my body from head to toe. This disturbing disgusting small bastard! Hoe could Ann chose to live her life with him?

"Ah, so you're..."

"Yes, you're right."

"I know, I know. Mr. Yang and his wife died yesterday, right? I figure that's your business here," he loudly spoke.

This guy tried to meddle. "Sort of," I replied and tried to be patient. "Why don't we just go inside and gather with Ann and Brian now?"

"Nah, later! After all, you're my guest, not vice versa."

My emotion blew again. If it wasn't a special occassion, he would be carried to hospital right then. But I remembered Ann. She shouldn't be given more troubles by her miserable brother only becuase of her husband who never learned basic rules of courtesy. My anger might spurt, but I shouldn't let them controlling me. At that time I was inspired to study more about behaving myself. I had a history of troubles which were cause of a single offensive word.

Whatever I was struggling with, he ignored the signs of my increasing temper and rambled through me. He walked calmly to the pantry. I wasn't interested to follow him, so I made my way back to the guest room. Brian wasn't there, but he left his bag on the sofa. I didn't know whether he delibrately left it there or not so I avoided to touch it. I turned my glance over the TV. It was the Evening News from a new TV channel (I could barely recall the name). The news said that the storm was over for the most of the city. The unstable air wave in the stratosphere had begun to gradually shrink. The news also informed that the current weather was hard to predict, for the whole earth's climate changed madly. A representative of the cabinet (I didn't really notice from which department) said that the people should be aware of the fluctuating weather condition. The traffic condition had started to recover and the highways were reopened.

It was a quite good progress for me. When the news changed to be celebrity news, I also changed the channel. The next channel showed a Bollywood movie, with thousand dancers twisting and girdling around the lovers who were standing near a tree. As long as I could recall, I always assumed that that kind of scene would pester me. so I pressed the remote control's button again. The next channel was airing another evening news. The news reported that there was a mass rally that was marching to a former Semhao's president's grave (or call it, mausoleum) to regurtitate their protest that incriminated the Supreme Court for vindicating the former president's children from their corruption cases. Bored to hear such a pity news, I turned off the TV. Semhao also hadn't changed to a better way, just like me.

In my childhood, I never had this habit of blaming everyone who shaped the world as an unjust place. In fact, I never used to be attracted by social issues, for I thought it was not my business. Why did I have to take care of other people's problems? I didn't know those people and I didn't want to know even. I believed that the world wasn't very veracious even to itself so if it's already bad, why be bothered?

My negligence might be as frightening as Brian once said years ago. I was once an introvert who preferred stoic philosophy to normal lifestyle. Based on my cynical belief that the world wouldn't be better, I took a perception that I had to fight these vehement enemies - the unjust world and its demons in the form of other people - back so at last I could receive profit from this bad world. I used to be so individualistic like that until I studied overseas. My eyes were opened to the presence of the other besides me. That was probably one main factor why I was more hedonistic right then. I perceived my past back and discovered the hedonistic side inside me. It actually was an attempt of useless and restless escape from reality.

Ann woke up my wandering mind.

"The food's ready, everyone! Let's eat!"

I followed the natural call that brought me to the dining table. It was near the pantry and surrounded by five frail-looking chairs. Everyone sat in detached manner. My anger had evaporated. We ate together as a familty. I could feel again the hospitality of my own family after all those lost years.

"So," asked Ann softly to me, "have you met Jeff?"

"Already in person," I replied fast.

"Jeff?" She stared at Jeff.

"As he said, but not in person," replied him coldly while devouring the hot soup.

"You never tell me that both of you get married," asked me curriously.

"I figured you'd have no tendency on that."

"At least you could send me a message."

"You're always the same, my brother. Always blaming the others."

"He'll never listen to you, sis," interrupted Brian.

"When will you stop mocking me?" asked me to Brian, annoyed.

"I've no tendency on that, brother."

"I'm here now," I tried my best to explain, "if that's what you've been waiting for. I'm willing to repent."

"No, you won't," answered Brian in a skeptic tone.

I admonished, "I can if I want to."

Brian shrieked, "Yeah, bro. I know you too well. You're a multi-versitile person who can solve and change everything. A polymath, polygot, and also robot. I know you won the NMO and SMO. I know you won the IFO and those all freaking medals. But, that's not what you're for us! I'm here to speak, on the behalf of the others, that you're no longer worthy for us. You disdain your parents and discourage them till the end. You bring many disasters and all you can to reward is to polute our family's good reputation!"

"Brian, I don't mean to...."

"Shut up! You may succedd in the curriculums, but where's your loyalty and passion for your family? Do you feel ashamed because Ann and I are your siblings? Do you deny us because we're intelectually poorer than you? Well done, Professor!" he continued his accussation.

"Brian, I urge you, please..."

He continued his harangue, "Even you weren't here when Toby died! His last wish, if you want to know, is to see you for the last time. But, what did you do? You dodged him with numerous logical reasons. I guess SMO's deadly more important than your brother."

"Please, stop it!"

Knowing that I became more nervous, he raised his tone and abased me more. "Yeah, a genius, a well-educated man you've become. Graduated from the best schools, only to find out that the only side of you that's well-educated is only your lust!"

It was more than enough. I raised up, banged the table hard and hollered, "ENOUGH!! STOP IT FOR GOD'S SAKE!!! If you want to banish me, okay! I'm out from this freaking house forever! Don't expect me to return until I die!"

He wasn't terrified at all with my thundering voice, but even challenged me further. "You're always pleased to go. Don't retard. Get your dirty soul out of my dad's and mom's house now!"

I was petrified for a while. I couldn't believe what he and I had just said. My mins was already overheated with his philippic speech. But I couldn't lose my confidence. Alright, Brian, you want me to scram, I'll humbly serve your wish, but only this time. I surged from the front door with my jacket and impadimenta while Brian and Jeffrey were watching carefully. When I almost reached the house gate, a hand held me.

"Wait!"

It was Ann. Even though it was already night, I could see the moonlight's reflection on her face. She had a sharp figure with round face and quite dark skin, in contrast to Jeffrey. She looked thinner than some years ago. I was sure it wasn't caused of bulemia or any stupid diets, but because of her perseverance. She grabbed my hand roughly.

"Please, forgive Brian. He's been too tired lately. He's also worried about you," she muttered.

"No, sis. I must go. I'm the one who's responsible for the whole chaos," I replied with a heavy heart.

She began to sob. "You're not responsible of mom's and dad's death. Please, don't just go away like this!"

"I can't. Brian has rejected and mortified me. He will step over my dead body in the next 24 hours if I insist to stay."

"No, he's not that cruel," she adjured, "I miss you these years. I need you. What do I have now? I've lost Toby, mom and dad. All the joy's vanished."

I embraced her with a deep broken heart. "Sis, I also miss you. Don't misunderstand me. Maybe this is the path that's been chosen for me."

She disagreed. "NO! You choose your own path. Please, don't torture me anymore!"

She cried in my hug. I couldn't dare to go away. I thought would cry for the second time that day too. No, I'd had enough of this tyranny. I wanted to break free. Even though I had to release my one and only sister's warm care. Ann, you never failed to steal a space that I never intended to create - the space for love. But I still had to go. I was too vicious for my family and neighbors, the saints of the world. I wouldn't erase the memory of us growing up together in this place which was once called 'slum'. Please spare me for I couldn't satisfy your thirst of a brother's presence.

"Goodbye, Ann," I muttered.

I released her hug and galloped to the street. I dared not to look back. And the image of her slowly disappeared as the rain got harder. Good bye, my family, my beloved sister! Good bye!

.. to be continued

Mobile Phone

2008-03-06T20:03:00.002-06:00

"Mobile Phone, Mobile Phone, tell me who's the most beautiful woman in the world!!!"
"It is you, Your Majesty."
"Mobile Phone, Mobile Phone, tell me who's the most beautiful woman in the world!!!"
"It is you, Your Majesty."
"Mobile Phone, Mobile Phone, tell me who's the most beautiful ..."
"Battery low. System shutting down......"

If Snow White lived in the era of mobile phone, surely she would easily be found by the Queen's assasin for her whereabouts can easily be detected by GPS. The Queen who is Snow White's evil step-mother could trash her magic mirror, for a complete database of the whole women in the world would be enough and more efficient if she wanted to compare her beauty.

That's not a ridiculous fairy tale. I just want to describe how powerful your mobile phone is now. It seems that the modern generation won't live without it. For example, imagine a life without SMS! You cannot comunicate with each other that easy. Moreover, SMS is almost counted as a free thing nowadays, even sometimes cheaper than fresh air and clean water. SMS is one of the most charming feature of mobile phone.

It's odd that mobile phone at first was used for pure communication purposes only. It was totally for urgent matter such as business meeting or military. However, some clever men captured the prospect of this device by inventing and adding many more entertainment features for mobile phone. Mobile phone then changed into a mini-computer. Mobile phone-related business then follows to be rich, such as SIM provider and even MP's casing business. This is when mobile phone turns to be your second soul.

Look at the ubiquitous pressence of mobile phone now. You mat see madness here and there: parents aborting their children because they're listening to their mobile phones, teenagers playing games on mobile phone while waiting for MRT, and so forth. Yes, games. It has even worsened the deep addictive impact. It's like that those mobile phone makers want to establish a new game console. I wonder in the future students will play Final Fantasy on the phone while calling their teachers.

Oh, that's also wrong! Your teacher can use the GPS to locate you and even rent a IT master (or a hacker) to trace all your activities. You seem to lose all your privacies now. This is the doom for those people who like to lie about their recent whereabouts (like irresponsible drunk husband for example).

For some people, mobile phone is a device to find a soul-mate. You can type 100 SMS per day to your loved one even you're far apart from him/her. You fill turn crazy when you hear the special ringtone of your phone indicating that your lover has replied (or another junk message that your free SMS toll has increased again due to your intensive SMS activity). Actually, who do you love at most then, the person you're communicating virtually or the phone? You may love the person that sends you SMS, but you actually lvoe your phone more. If suddenly your phone turns blank without any reason, you may want to cry till your blood oozes.

This is what Baudrillard sayas about implosion of communication. You don't have to live in reality to stay exist. You have your second life, your virtual identity. Not only by cell phone, you can create your personal avatar in Friendster, MySpace, Facebook, and even this Blogspot. However, since cellphone has more fans and users, cellphone seems to be more suitable to be a Communication God. Your virtual identity may not be your real condition, but it reflects your desire. Your virtual identity provides you a virtual escape and facilities to express. However, because the virtual world isn't real, we can express almost anything there and sometimes forget to get back to where we actually belong.

Is Mobile Phone that bad? I'm not saying it's bad. The point is you should be able to behave yourself even to the most indulging and entertaining child of technology.

And you will be the master of your mobile phone then, not vice versa...

The Language Elitist

2008-03-06T06:46:00.002-06:00

For those who don't know what I'm going to write about, it's about the Wee Shu-Min affair. I know this scandal after my form teacher told me about three weeks ago. I'm interested to write a bit about a blog that disrupts almost the whole education community of Singapore. I mainly use this page as reference: http://intelligentsingaporean.wordpress.com/wee-shu-min/

I don't want to add more allegations and critques; I believe that it's been enough ashaming for her and her family to be blamed, accused, mocked, blacklisted and resented by many Singaporeans and bloggers.

I think that this case is a serious warning. If good education only encourage its students to be 'uncaring elitists', then what is it for? This world is different from academy perfomance. If you only think of getting good grades so you can be superior, I think you have failed the very basic concept of education. Education's purpose is to make human a complete human, with mature way of thinking and sufficient ability to contribute to society. A society will not work without the cooperation of the people behind it. What do you learn then if you never want to apply your lessons in the real world?

This is also very cruel to attack someone not because his mistakes, but because of his educational background. It's like you criticise your own parents who may not have the same level of education as you to be stupid because they're not as clever as you. Thus, your parents are stupid to raise a child who behaves like that, aren't they? You should consider that you won't able to live alone. You need cooperation. You need other people with other specialities. You can ridicule farmers who don't know English, but without them, can you eat rice everyday?

Some people commented that the situation might be different if she never posted that blog OR she wasn't a daughter of a Parliament Member. Well, I think her parent's position in the government doesn't decide the measure of her mistake. Otherwise, we should 'thank' her for publishing this latent threat to the world and indirectly using her father's name to make it more popular.

Nevertheless, we shouldn't continue indicting her and her family. The probability that she may not be the only person who thinks like this is more important. There may be many more 'elitists' who think they are superior because of their academic perfomance so they can escape from the issue of common people. They forget about on thing that's more important, characters. Academic perfomance only decides your ability and speciality, but in order to survive, we need good relationships to the others. That's why even Hillary Clinton and Barrack Obama spend most of their time now to gain support from common people, not professors from splendid universities.

For me, 'language elitist' is similar to racism. The difference is you look at the people's academic intellegence, not skin color. Thus you make quick assumptions that you're superior if you're studying in this school and you have this excellent grades. Well, your marks are only numbers, written on a paper that can be burned or shredded easily. What's more important is your character. If you have intelligence, what will you use it for? Do you think that the government provides education with good equality so you can mock each other? That will only bring a bleak future to the next generation.

If this is not responded and corrected quickly, this problem can spread enough and raise other 'elitists' who have shallow ability of living in a society. Nobody wants this kind of future for sure.

1984, The Real Utopia or Just Dystopia?

2008-03-04T07:31:00.001-06:00

You may think I really have nothing to do by writting something about this phenomenal novel.

I have to admit that 1984 is one of my favourite. It consists of politic, philosophy, culture, and wars. It just indulges my imagination to wonder there are only three states in the world. God, where is diversity? It is a real Inferno to live in a very big states controlled by a remorselss tyrant who wants to be nicknamed "Big Brother". Why does hypocrisy have huge control over human?

However, stop mocking Oceania government. Just start to think further about Oceania. There are three main groups in Oceania society. The Proles, the majority, is the poorest and most miserable who only knows how to survive today and extol Big Brother. They actually have power, but it seems that this Oceania government has found the way to defeat their needs of expression freedom. Even the government nearly suceeds in order to control the whole reproduction of the Proles. It's very unlikely that a breakthrough like French or Russian Revolution will occur, for the Proles theirselves don't have anything to complain. They don't know that they're treated as a living animal. They don't have the idea of any better form of society. Their knowledges are limited by severe censorship, restriction, and the future Newspeak. If they have nothing to complain about, then Oceania is a perfect society of them. they know only one vision: Oceania has always been in war with Eurasia/Eastasia (not sure which is correct) and with the great guidance of Big Brother, they will win and conquer the world. Can't we say that Oceania is, realtively, a utopia for them, the hapless Proles?

I also want to talk about the limitation of the language. In Oceania, people aren't expected to be smart and professional; they're supposed to be stupid for the rest of their life. The Inner Party (the most powerful caste - the government) chose limitation of language which resulted in "Newspeak". I won't tell many things about this, except that "Newspeak" really causes deep frustation. Its basic idea is to destroy the number of words used in the language so people will not have media to express theirselves. Moreover, for those who never know the original English ("Oldspeak") will be the true product of Newspeak. For example, the word "freedom" will be removed from the language, so people will not have any idea of freedom. It seems that English will be dead easy if this method is applied, but if only you see one single sentence of Newspeak.... I can't understand it all. The confusing uses of preffix and suffix will replace the beauty of English vocabulary which covers a huge range of words from various sources. You will not find 'malicious', 'onerous', or even 'woefull'; they're replaced by 'plusungood' or 'doubleplusonegood'. The second concept is to use the same word with different meanings, which leads to "doublethink". For example, the Party's slogan "FREEDOM IS SLAVERY" can be logically explained if one dare to think further. At the end of the day, it's not strange if Newspeak only has about 200 words in its dictionary.

Of course, it's a torture for mankind to have a language so simple as that. Culture will automatically disappear and setback of human civilization will begin. However, this does not apply for the Party - the Government who controls everything, who has the privilege to violate any laws they create; they are the law. The people will most likely have reduced intellegence level and great depression so they won't be able to rebel. However, if they have no desire to rebel against the government even no dissatisfaction over the situation, isn't that a utopia for them?

To understand Newspeak means that you have to acquire the ability of 'doublethink', the concept that Emmanuel Goldstein, a Jew who's the leader of the Brotherhood, a secret society against Big Broter, creates and applies. For example, the meaning of word freedom can be explained by using simple equation: two plus two equals to four. Freedom is freedom to say two plus two equals to four; if that's granted, all else follows.

Besides Newspeak, the most frightening ministry in Oceania, Ministry of Love, plays a great rule to keep Oceania society loyal to Big Brother. Its victims are those who oppose the Party and most of them are the Brotherhood member. The victims are tortured physically and psychologically until they adapt the Party's every word as the truth, even when the Party member who tortures say that 'two plus two equals to five'. It's an elegant way of brainwashing; after that, the victims will 'love' Big Brother again. If those surviving victims have 'love' in their mind for their government, isn't that a utopia for them?

All those examples show that human mind is very relative and prone to change 180 degrees. When we have this concept of 'utopia' with us, what we imagine is actually our own desires. We have desires because we have expanded knowledge of something and we believe that it can be achieved. If our government is like the Party, who finds the way to control human desires, hence our concepts and perspectives will follow. There is no passion and desire anymore, only needs which are controlled for political means. There will be no struggle inside our mind, no jealousy to see the others have more. There will be no such thing called 'love' in human relationship, for 'love' is only for Big Brother and the Party. You lose your rights to choose and now you also lose your rights to think. However, when you can't think properly and in complex context, won't you be happy for there seem to be no problems ahead for you? Isn't that utopia?

I realize that a real utilitarian utopia society will have enough problems in it to make a dystopia out of it. There will always be differences among the men in the society, and this wil eventually lead to clash and conflicts. Hence, why don't we think otherwise? In order to create a realistic utopia, we have to construct it based on the ideas of dystopia? Isn't this a cruel contradiction? Probably, it's not if you still have normal human mind. You may argue by saying 'of course I can be fooled but the truth is still the truth'. That's right, but how do you struggle? You may risk your life and challenge death but leave no useful ideas for the people left behind to continue the fight. This is a perfect society for those who govern, and seems to be a perfect society for those who are governed. Now, you have only one choice in this kind of utopia: be a leader or be a follower.

And nothing's better. This's a Utopia right, how can there be something better than the perfect?

Isn't this the real Utopia?

Utopia: A Reflection

2008-03-04T07:27:00.002-06:00

This is actually for SS, but I like to post it here for some subtle reasons.

To write a utopia magazine is an exciting but tough job. For me, the problem is what kind of Utopia that I wish to have. It seems easy to imagine a perfect society and flawless world, but when I explore the topic further, I find some difficult contradictions.

Firstly, I think about a very perfect nation, with no troubles, no diseases, no crimes and no disasters. However, I soon figure out that a nation without any flaws will not work at all. What are the police for if there is no crime? What is the government for if everyone in the society can live together peacefully and in harmony? What are science and technology innovations for if human never faces any disaster or diseases? I consider that utopia must also be realistic and suitable to the basic human nature despite its fantasy. That’s what Forum section for – to give people space to give advises and complains.

As long as people live in this world, they will always have needs. The basic problem is that every person has different needs compared to the others for every single person is created as a unique individual. The problem increases when a person tries to force his will to the others who don’t have the same opinion with the idea.

The democracy in my group’s utopia nation is based on our own experience when we created this newspaper. We derive almost all the names in the newspaper from daily life’s name and mixtures of Indonesian and Vietnamese languages. Our concept of democracy is to give people equal chance and opportunity to fulfill their potential, not to give people complete freedom, for irresponsible freedom will only lead to human rights violation. Utopia isn’t the place where we can do whatever we want. It’s a place when your rights and expressions are secured.

Leadership is indispensable in every country, including utopia, as the guide for the country. If all the people have the equal power to control the society, there will be chaos due to the people’s differences. People need to hand over the sovereignty to a group of people which are specialists in that way. Nevertheless, to be leaders don’t mean that they have rights to corrupt the government. As long as the people in the government are corrupt, the government will not work correctly.

Is Utopia ever possible? If you can only want to dream, Utopia will never come true. It starts from each individual. It’s better to change ourselves to a better way before thinking majestically about changing the world. We see this world not as what the world is, but as what we actually are. If we have poor attitude and mentality, there’s always possibility our contribution to the society bring negative impact and convert the society to be dystopia.

At the end of the day, everyone has his own image of utopia; it’s definitely subjective. That’s why utopia’s never possible as an objective reality.

Injury Time 1.0

2008-02-22T06:10:00.002-06:00

Nobody is Nobody.

I suddenly found that unique concept. Like Virtue of the Vicious, this aphorism (if you want to categorize it as aphorism) is an impromptu. I didn't plan to search it. Neither it is a nonsense quotations.

I think I will insert that idea into the next part of my poor story. Why poor? I figure out that my English is still not that fluent. I see that fact in my compositions' grades. My eyes are accustomed to sentence structure and vocabulary errors. Hope that I won't see many flaws in my next compositions. But who can guess?

Or maybe.... that random aphorism above isn't an impromptu at all. If you're a vivid reader of Pramoedya Ananta Toer, you'll discern. I'm not Toer's hysterical fans nor civil left activist who devote to his utopian humanity concept in the society. I prefer Plato's cave. Nevertheless, if you ever take a look at This Earth of Mankind, you will notice that being in the society is a fallacy. But being nobody in society is also a fallacy. So, being nobody isn't condusive, thus nobody should be nobody. See my point? Maybe you'll say my statement is a fallacy due to random and careless reasoning and lack of evidences.

More random stuff. When I was waiting for 5 months from June to November before I went to Singapore, I entered SMA Aloysius BN (my previous school's senior high). I had an exiciting 2 and a half months there before I decided to quit and clear all the slate. Not all of the memories born from those 2 1/2 months are scintilliating, but I insist to place that period of time as one of the best days of my lives (I adapt this term from Queen's song). I could slack everyday; I never studied but I still did my exam quite well. But here, in Singapore? Like I said, my English! Moreover, my troubles increase with Malay. More words and pains. That's the joy in learning something new. That's what adaptation is.

What shall I do with my sweet... I mean scintilliating memory of those SMA days? I'll try to write them in my blog. Certainly I will change the names and the settings to avoid conflicts and controversies. I will put no special purpose in making this thing. I just want to reminisce and practise. My writing depends on intuition entirely. Except assignment or assesments, I never set a particular target and plan. I just want to express myself in this foreign language. By the way, I once wrote in English before, about 2 years ago. My English was far worse. I published that worthless story under a pseudonym name.

Go back to the real topic!! I just can't stop my mind wandering everywhere. Maybe I belong to my fantasy. I really like the moment I'm spending time in my own world. Just relieving from the onerous real world. But that doesn't mean I will escape forever. I'm not an escapist; I just have passion about art. Is it kismet that brings me to be like this? Or just random chance?

What I really want to say is (I have used the wrong English once again; how can I write the word "say" if my communication partner is an Internet user and/or probably an Internet-addict too that reads but doesn't listen to my words?) that I will stop my blogging activity until the holiday. I have to concentrate on CCT, CA, SPA, and their other friendly brothers. For me, test is a test, no matter how great it affects GPA and even my perfomance in the school.

At last, I'm lost now! It means that this random article will meet the end.

Nobody is Nobody.

Virtue of the Vicious: I

2008-02-16T09:43:00.001-06:00

After three years living and studying in Pulantai, it was time to go home.

My brother called me overseas that something terrible had happened and I was asked to go home urgently. Understimating the seriousness of the situation at first, I was dreadfully shocked when I heard my brother's voice:

"Dad and Mom are gone. Car accident."

I lost my high arrogancy and dropped the phone. I couldn't continue speaking; tears rown down from my eyes and I was very dejected and deranged. How could everything turn out like this? Everyone in the boarding convinced me to go home quickly or I would likely become insane. Going home meant that I had to dig again all the painful memories. Yes, I used to reside in Semhao, but I totally wished that I had put a full stop on that fact. I just never wished to go back home. I was happy and safe in Pulantai. I had a lot of friends and built a nice community supporting each other. They treated me as a brother. Going home to Semhao meant that I would see feudalism and convetionalism again. Generation gap would return to annoy me again.

It was like I volunteered to travel to a remote developing nation. I was like a missionary; I had to pray for my parents' eternal rest in this world and their journey in the afterlife. My mind couldn't be filled with other questions but when I would go back to Pulantai. Return to Pulantai that I loved...

It was 10 o'clock. The plane arrived at Kusno-Saichi Airport. I completed every procedure to step out and I took a taxi to take me back to my home in Cadas.

Cadas was a city near the Semhao's capital, Hueta. It used to have beautiful reputation and apellation such like "Venice van Semhao" and "the Flower City". With the brand new highway, the city could be reached from the airport for only one hour. As the taxi entered the city gate (as long as I could remember Cadas never had one), I noticed an abundance of changes. I felt that this city had been updated so much yet I couldn't believe my eyes. It seemed that this city had been transformed into a new Mini-Hueta, including the heavenly cilmate and the amazing metropolitan scenery.

I was quite surprised when the taxi driver drove into a tunnel immediately after it passed the road near the railway. A tunnel? The driver explained to me that it was the city tunnel. It connected the whole city as the trafic situation demanded it. Just within 15 minutes, I had been on the Circle Route near the Wide Meadow. I thought the tunnel ended in the same place where the carpenters used ot live. I looked again at my watch. It was still 11.30, but why was the sky quite dark? Pollution steam, I guessed. But, since when there are any factories in Cadas? I was totally lost in my birth city.

Then the cab plunged into another tunnel. The late tunnel was shorter and brighter. This tunnel connected the Circle Route to the Bypass Route, which had became a city express highway. As the cab moved steadily, Igazed at the scenery from the side windows. There was no farm anymore beside the highway; tall buildings stood to replace the farms.

The cab leaned right to enter the graveyard complex. I had a feeling that I was once familiar with this place, but I couldn't recall what that was. The cab stopped outside the parking area. It was my intention not to park inside because there might be my family member snapped me. I felt qualm; I didn't bring anything. Neither I had sent condolences messages.

I moseyed around to find the entrance with my luggance hold by my left hand. I tarried my way to the grave site. Maybe I would feel guilty when I reached there and I disliked that. I was also unable to resist accusations and critics if I rebuked with my family. My confidence glowed out for a while then motivated me to make my way.

With unwilling steps, I strolled to the grave. The news was true, indeed. A group of people in black was gathering around a new pair of graves, the place where the only people who I loved in this city would rest forever. Suddenly, pangs of sadness inevitably showed up and conquered my mind. I languished at that moment as I realized I had been too sinful to my parents these three years. I'd never have oppurtunities anymore to reconcilliate. How shor life is if you keep delaying...

I couldn't go on; I stepped back a while and coruched with my hands covering my sobbing eyes. I wished that this wasn't a public place so I could regurgitate evrything. I felt like a toddler; all I could to regret was to cry aloud. Strickening sorrow sound could be heard inside my sour soul. For a moment I raised again from my dis-ease and tried to at least trudge.

The sound of my mumbling mouth revealed my existence. One of the bereaving people saw in the eyes, tried to figure out who I was, then trotted upon me. I was still shuddering shen imeediately this girl ran onto me and hugged me tightly. She was also crying, maybe her pain was far deeper than mine. From her weak voice I knew she was Anna, my elder sister. She never changed and unexpectedly still acted the same behaviours on me. I couldn't hold my guilt anymore.

Soon after that, a younger man marched to me and my sister and harshly pushed us away from each other. He pushed my body, grabbed my shirt, and clenched his mighty fist. He was much bigger than me. His eyes, terrifying all my leaking balance, threatened me and reflected a deep rancour. Acting wildly, he tried to punch my cheek. I managed to catch his hand, spinned it around with my judo technique. He kept resisting by swinging his leg to my hip.

"STOP! Will both of you stop this?"

Anna shouted in a hysterical tone. Both of us were awaken from emotion. And that was also the time that I knew my enemy was my own brother, Brian. The last time I met him he was still a weak thin boy. But his naive attitude never changed. I gently released my grip on his arm and stared at her. I was aware I had spoiled everything around.

"I am sorry..." I faltered.
"Sorry what? You murderer!" Brian shrieked.
"Stop it Brian! He's just arrived! Show at least little sympathy for him!" Anna replied.
"Sympathy for what?! We've given so much yet he wasted all!"
"He's also mom's child too."
"He had been NO son of mom and dad for the last three years!"
"Just CLOSE your lousy mouth!"

Everyone's stunned. Anna's last scream was so frightening. It even successfully locked Brian's revengeful mouth. She relaxed a bit, lowered her tone and calmly approached me.

"Welcome home," she muttered.
"Well, thank you, sis," I tried my best to speak.
"No need to say thanks. Brian is correct about everything," she said softly but deadly.
"Well, I don't know what I've done..."
"Yeah, and probably you've no idea we still exist here."

I couldn't fight her soft but hurting words. They pierced my conscience. I didn't continue the conversation. Trudging bery slowly, I moved my reluctant feet to the grave. When I read the name scriptured on the tomb, I fell, kneeled and cried again. My whole body trembled hard. My mind was entirely numb. Haunted by guilt, I uselessly muttered to ask forgiveness.

Brian and Anna watched me from the back. I could hear they discussed about something, but none of their words could I comprehend. They were speaking in Walrusnese, the local language and dialect of Cadas. I'd lost all my Walrusnese ability, for I'd traded it for English.

"Please stop crying like a baby. You're a grown-up man now. There's no use to behave this way," she said.

But I wouldn't want to listen to her advise. I was too insane to neglect the call of regrets. I put my head down to the wet soil that was just used to cover the grave. I had cut myself from the outer world and surrendered to the devil of tragedy."

(....to be continued)

Virtue of the Vicious: Introduction

2008-02-16T09:36:00.002-06:00

I just want to introduce my story which I think I will gradually publish. I write this story based on my own experience this last 3 months, with a lot of imagination garnish. I think I have to assert that this story is completely a FICTION. If there is any similarity in person's name, location, time, plot, or even the whole story, I believe that's only a coincidence.

The protagonist of this story is a nameless character. I may never give a name for him, for I like anonymous people.... After all, it's only a FICTION.

This story will take various point of views. I mean that I will switch which person will be the narrator of this story. I also quote Oscar Wilde for the title (Oscar Wilde said that "vice is the virtue of the vicious). Except that, I have nothing to be copyrighted because it's my own original story. After all, it's only a FICTION.

I have no particular plan how this story will finish. I just get the idea and grab it from the thin air. Sounds irrational? Don't say that, please. It's only a FICTION.

The story takes place in an imaginary world. The story will mostly take place in a country called Republic of Semhao. It is a big island situated in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean (similar to Atlantis), and rich of natural resources and corruptions. Semhao can be very rich and very advanced, but its government is so corrupted and malicious. There is a secret underground movement to overthrow the current corrupt cabinet. Meanwhile, there is another nation near to Semhao called Pulantai. Its location is around Iceland in the real world. This country, even it is only a small island, enjoys prosperity and delightful welfare. With a great contrast to Semhao, Pulantai provides a scholarship program for youths from Semhao to study. With the connection of their education system, the Semhao youngsters can open the gate to study in Europe.

The setting has nothing to do with reality, it is just my personal imagination. After all, it's just a FICTION.

On Singaporeans' Social Graces

2008-02-16T09:14:00.003-06:00

You can see obviously from the title that this is about a social problem. Actually, I have put a little interest in this topic before I was assigned to create a review on Tessa Wong's article in The Strait Times about this social grace.

Having stayed in Singapore for about three and a half month, I have found that the local Singaporeans are mainly nice to me. The greatest difficulty that I once had (and actually I still have now but it's not that bad anymore) was their accent. Even I didn't understand the Malay's accent! They sounded like Chinese to me and I am totally inexperienced in Mandarin. After training my ear for one month, I begin to get used to it.

Now let's relate this to the main topic. I must give an honest comment here that most of the Singaporeans are not as friendly as the Indonesian people. I take an example from the market. The cashier serves the customer without any single smile. They only talk shortly and reluctantly with unclear English. When I said, "Thank you, Auntie", they didn't reply with something polite like "You're welcome" etc.

I also found this problem in the streets. On Christmas Eve, my friends and I went to the Good Shepherd Cathedral to join the Mass. It was midnight then and we got a bit lost so we had to ask the pedestrians around where the MRT is. I asked this man in a polite manner and he replied rather unfriendly with a high tone. He seemed quite disturbed as if I intended to block his way.

I believe that the Singapore has a briliant system of education, which I experience by myself in the class. However, if that only shapes the people's mind to think and solve problems without knowing how to practice the simple rule of courtesy, what's that for? I haven't known much about the Singapore History so I can't really talk about this "kiasu heritage" that Tessa Wong talked about in her article. However, I believe that even this attitude is a "tradition" of the Singaporeans, it still can be changed. Isn't that the purpose of education, which is to make human behaving like human? Well, courtesy and social grace can't be taught in the form of textbooks and worksheet papers. They are best taught by examples.

The young generation can start this reformation. They are the future of their country and they have the power to stop this "tradition". I realize that it's too fantastic if the change happens suddenly, but it's not bad to have a wish, is it?

Maybe the pressure of the occupation or education that makes some Singaporeans ignore the importance of social grace. People tend to forget courtesy if they're rushing. Yet it's still better to begin revolutionizing to a better way.

I haven't experienced any "Xenophobia" or racial prejudice problem until I write this blog. I believe that the Singapore society is a great society. They prove to be tolerant among the different races, religions, and even languages. Nonetheless, this little flaw of social disgrace may damage a bit the image of the Singaporeans in the eyes of the foreigners. Also, like Elissa Tan said, if Singapore wants to reach a particular target of population number, the current society must be prepared first for all the challenges that may lie ahead. The first challenge is, unfortunately, the social disgrace problem.

Introduction

2008-02-09T06:33:00.001-06:00

Hello, visitors of this newborn blog!
I think it's not to appropriate to indroduce myself here. However, I think you will know what kind of person I am if you have read further my writings. I have made a lot of unpublished writings that I think I will post here in the near future. I never have a blog before so I think I will not be able to edit the page style vastly, though I'm a little familiar with HTML.
I'm lack of time now so I will post the most neccessary things.

By the way, as the appetitizer, I want to know why there is no Canon in C? I'm refering to Johann Pachbel's famous Canon in D. I mean, if you understand piano, you will find playing this masterpiece song much easier if you play it in C. Even the Canon Rock uses D as the root key. Well, maybe Canon in C is too easy for those music experts. Unfortunately, I'm not one of them!